Angel | BTS ✓

Chapter 47

[Hoseok's P.O.V.]

I walk to (Y/N)'s room, planning on asking her if she wants to go and hang out today. Ever since 2015, we've had packed schedules and a crazy surplus in fans, so we've never really gotten any time to do much where it's just me and her. Now that we have a free day, maybe I can take her somewhere.

I blush a little bit, thinking of the connotation of those words.

Shaking my head in frustration, I clear my thoughts, hand going up to knock on the door. Then, I knock three times, taking a step back to wait on her to greet me at the door. It's fairly early, so she should still be asleep. I took this into account and knocked as loud as I could.

I wait for a few seconds, tapping my foot while patiently waiting. I start to feel a little guilty, knowing that I'm waking her up from much-needed rest.

Thinking about it for a while, I realize she still hasn't come to the door. I quickly decide that I'm just going to leave her alone for a little longer and maybe come back later, but first I'm going to check on her. She's adorable when she sleeps, after all.

My hand lowers to the door knob, grasping it before turning it and then pushing the door open as to where it won't make any noise if she's asleep. I poke my head in, my eyes instantly going to the empty bed. The sheets are perfectly tucked into each end of the bed, and the pillows are perfectly stacked in a way that looks presentable.

I take notice very easily that she's not here, and for some reason, she made her bed. And along with that, her entire room is neat, too.

I begin to panic a little.

I'm one to think pretty rational and stay calm under a lot of pressure, but when it comes to my best friend for so long who I care so much for, I can easily begin to get worked up.

She didn't tell any of us that she's going to go somewhere today. I mean, she can drive, but she pretty much never goes out to enjoy herself.

It's a little suspicious, but maybe it's nothing, right?

I'm not nosy, either, but after scanning around the room for a second, I notice a sheet of notebook paper laying out on her dresser. The side part is torn off, and I manage to smile a little bit. She's done that since we were in primary school.

I open the door wide open, knowing the other members aren't awake so nobody will wander in. Strolling over to the dresser, my hand meets the distinct material of the paper, picking it up as my eyes meet the first word. 'A... note?'

I squint my eyes, looking closer. There's tear stains dotted around the paper, and they look fairly old. A deep, dark feeling swirls inside of me. I'm a little nervous to read it.

Something's so, so wrong about all of this.

'Dear Whoever Is Reading This First,

Maybe this is selfish of me, but I think it's right. I've never been the type of person to do things for myself. Well—yeah, I do things to improve myself, but never actually anything for myself, and I recognize that.

This is something I'm doing for that purpose. I've been here for twenty-two years. The first few years were spent as an innocent child, one who had a big dream, and that's all there was to it. I had friends, even though I eventually lost all of them and was left with only Hoseok a bit later on, but I've never truly been alone, especially with someone like him.

That's yet another thing I recognize. I've never really been that bad off, yet I still let it all get to me. And then, even when I did let it all get to me as stated, I still stayed because I know my dad would've wanted me to. Not only would he have wanted me to do just that, but I wanted to myself as well, no matter what forms of self destruction I resorted to, because I felt I had a purpose with you guys.