hello i am god, nice to meet you

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Alex: you see, the meaning of life is to make sure that your race survives, and the only way of doing that is making babies, so in other words the meaning of life is Sex.

said Alex as he explained the meaning of life to Qrow, who just stared at him like he was crazy.

Qrow: ...okay...

oh i forgot to mention this, but Alex teleported himself to a RWBY world. while doing so he also made a discovery....

every dimension of a world had A unlimited amount of different realities, for example RWBY.

he visited 67 different versions of it and saw some real weird shit in them...he really doesnt want to talk about it...

in one of those different versions of remnant he encountered a weird guy with HUGE horns and one of the blackest Aura he saw thus far. He asked for the ability to travel between dimensions, but since i was coffee deprived and just wanted to go and find another RWBY world where nothing was tempered with by a multidimensional being (ah, yea, i meet a couple of those in the 67 different RWBY worlds).

when i tried to writte his payment, the book just showed "the Supreme being  has already payed for this wish (2 free wishes remaining)"....okay?
well since it was payed already i just let him go without any shady trick, but i didnt tell him that...he still thinks he has some sort of restrain on him.

Hehe, im evil >:3

okay back to traveling the RWBY worlds.

and even if he found a RWBY world without a multiverse being inside it, they were to weird or seriously fucked up.

like that Futa RWBY world...

...we dont talk about the Futa RWBY world.

now finally in the 68th version of the RWBY world, everything seems to be normal...he spend 3 days, nothing weird or suspicious....and today when he walked into a bar he saw Qrow fucking Branwen...a young Qrow...

seeing this Alex let out a tired sigh.

Alex: im in the fucking past...fuck it!

he said and then bought a drink and sit down beside Qrow.

Alex: hey, have you ever wondered about the meaning of life?

you know what happened next so lets timeskip a little okay?

---timeskip brought you by chibi Alex and Chibi Qrow creating their own strip club---

1 month after meeting Qrow, we became good friends and created our own business. Thats right! that timeskip was fucking cannon! Alex and Qrow own a Strip club!!!

Alex: okay, all is done, now we just need bitches!

Qrow: i know one called Raven, but i dont think its the kind of "bitch" you are referring to.

dont worry Qrow i will fuck Raven one way or another...wait, if i bone Raven and she gives birth to Yang does that mean he spend an ungodly amount of time fapping to his daughter in the past?...

incest is wince- okay no. nope. nah. nadda! Incest is the only line he will never cross...nope! fuck that!

...wait, no you should not fuck that. dont fuck your family, the only people that can do that are the ones living in SWEAT HOME ALABAMA!

also step family does not count, you can fuck step family, go for it.

Alex: maybe we should hire some hookers from the shady part of Vale

Qrow: you are a genius my friend.

sudently Qrow Scroll started ringing and just as he was about to decline the call, Alex spoke up.

Alex: you have been ignoring those calls for the whole month, are you sure its a good idea?

Qrow: its fine, thats just my sis-

breaking the speed of sound he grabbed Qrow scroll and answered the call. time to flirt.

(A/N: frisk would be proud.)

---in Undertale world---

Chara: since when you were the one in control!

...

Frisk: *flirt mode Activate!* oh my~ dont worry i dont mind you being on top~~

...

...

...

...

Chara: we are 12 wtf?

---normal POV---

pressing the green button, Alex had a smirk on his face as Qrow looked confused and irritated at the same time.

Raven: QROW GET YOUR ASS BACK TO BEACON BEFORE I -

Alex: hi~

...

Raven: who are you? im sure that i called Qrow.

Alex: me? im Qrow partner business partner!

declared Alex with pride clear in his voice.

Summer: huh?

oh cool, Summer is there too!

Alex: allow me to introduce myself! Alex, the god of sex, madness, hell, creation, and some other things that i still need to decide on. I am also the co-owner of the new strip club in Vale, Qrow being my partner!

said Alex as he didnt even tried to hide the fact that he is a (self proclaimed) God. Qrow didnt even flinched, he already knew that.

At first he didnt believe but after Alex kicked a mountain into space he didnt have any excuse to not believe that his friend is in fact a God.

Raven: ...What?

Alex: by the way, would you be interested in becoming a stripper? we lack bitches to dance for our customers and Qrow mentioned you are one.

for the first time in his life Qrow didnt managed to hold his alcohol and performed a spit-take, he looked at Alex with a look of horror and betrayal, not believing that his best pal would do something like this to him

Summer: wait! Raven STOP! CALM DOWN!

summer yelled as the sound of Raven running away from the dorm to find Qrow and Alex was heard.

???: yup, they are dead.

said a unknown to Alex female voice

by the time the call ended and Alex looked up from the scroll, Qrow has already traveled half the way to Atlas.

Alex just let out a laugh and put Qrow scroll into his pocket...he should expect a very angry future Milf barging into his strip club pretty soon.

Raven: QROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!

holly shit, that was fast. how did she even find this place so quickly?

(A/N: plot)

Raven: where is he!?

she yelled as kicked the door open and noticed that he was not in the club

Alex: damn! you really are hot! hey are you sure, you dont want to be a stripper? i can get you a bikini.

the glare Raven send Alex would have made even Salem to be uncomfortable, however Alex wasnt fazed in the slightest.

Raven: you will tell me where Qrow is, and when im done with him, i will deal with you.

Alex: oh my~

while this was happening Summer arrived to the strip club thanks to her semblance (the same as Ruby) and was about to walk in, and try to save that poor fool who angered her teammate.

Raven: you better start talking before i cut you down!

oh boy, this sounded serious! she better hurry and stop this.

Alex: cut me down?

said Alex as he let out a dark giggle

Alex: dont flatter yourself, you are to Weak.

after those words left Alex mouth everything just stopped...Summer who was now in the doorway paled slightly and very slowly, and very quietly closed the door...

"he pushed the 'weak' button...you should never push the 'weak' button." she thought and promised herself to bring nice flowers to Alex tombstone.

Raven stayed still for a moment, not moving a single muscle.

...

nothing...

...

not even the sound of her breath could be heard...

...

i will be honest, at this Point the murder intent that Raven was releasing was kinda scaring Alex.

Raven: weak?

she asked no one specifically. AND THEN! in a flash Raven was right behind Alex and her katana already moving to chop his head off! what Raven didnt expect however was for her sword to snap as soon as it collided with Alex neck.

she froze and looked in disbelief, that katana was made from [Iron Dust]! Dust and Iron mixed together to make something even stronger then Steel! and its just snapped!?

Alex: y'know, i didnt lie when i said im "God" y'know?

he really wasnt, he didnt have any divinity yet, but its an undeniable fact that he is at God-level when it comes to everything in his body and magic.

Alex: my turn.

he said and gave the shocked Raven a palm strike right into her chest, while applying some eldritch magic into it, forcing Raven to go into her astral form and then send her to a trip across the Multiverse, just like the Ancient one did to Dr.Strange.

1 minute and 3 seconds later, Alex decided to bring her back into her body, and when that happened Raven seemingly lifeless body jolted awake and looked all around the room. When they come across the figure of Alex she flinched and prepared for combat.

a fighter! he likes that!

Alex: oh, i definitely like you~

with a speed impossible to see with the naked eye Alex pinned Raven to the wall, holding her both her arms above her head with one hand and holding her chin with the other.

Alex: hello there my dear Raven~

he said and started to carries her left cheek with the same hand that was holding her chin earlier. The action made her visibly uncomfortable, But she had a mix of Gray, and Black Aura so he didnt care.

Alex: i am God, nice to meet you.

he said once again declaring his "godhood".

Alex: im going to let you go, and when i do, you will behave yourself

he said and then leaned into Raven ear, and whispered

Alex: so be a good girl and listen to Daddy okay~?

feeling Alex breath on her skin Raven felt shivers go trough her entire body... She felt weird.

Needless to say, after seeing Alex power, she knew better then to attack him again...he made it pretty clear that he was leagues above her...just what the hell was that semblance? it was not illusion...it felt way to real

he was right...she was weak, well in front of him at least...this was the first time she has been so out leagued and it made her felt angry.

seeing the Anger on Raven face Alex tilted his head, and thought that she was mad at him...which was understandable, but not like he cared about it...he will make Raven fall for him one way or another. She can be mad all her life right?

Alex: soooo? want a drink??...its on me~

he said while looking at Raven who was at lost on what to do in this situation.

Summer: HEY! NO DRINKING! WE ARE 17!!

yelled "harem target #2" as she busted trough the door and glared at Alex with that adorable face of hers...i didnt think i would say something like this...but...HOLLY SHIT SHE IS EVEN MORE CUTE THEN RUBY!

PROTECC!

he must protect that sweet cinnamon roll! with his life if he has to!!

Alex: well in that case how about strawberry milk and cookies?

if Summer was just like Ruby that this must works...and it did! After saying that the next thing he saw was Summer rushing at him with a white version of Ruby semblance and hugging him while looking at him with star filled eyes.

the feel to PROTECC is strong in this one...











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