UNEXPECTED | lkr

FORTY-EIGHT

! this is keran's pov from when they had the break up:) please don't be confused, it's the same events from before !

"Yuxin?" Hearing the very much familiar voice, I flinched in my spot as my eyes trailed to her figure from the mirror.

She seemed hesitant, knowing how I was in the room with her. I shifted in my position, feeling uneasy. My eyes stayed on her, forgetting how I was just practicing the dance a few seconds ago.

My mind wandered off, getting lost in her presence. "No, don't be picky." I heard Yuxin say as she pulls her in our room. I didn't know what to feel. I didn't know if I should be happy or sad that she's here.

I shake my head, trying my best to ignore her. It won't be good for the both of us. I couldn't help but sneak a few more glances over to her direction.

"Ah, let's just do this tomorrow." Yuxin sits (Y/N) down, going to the doorway, "I'll get you some water. Stay." I remembered the favor I asked her and mentally smiled, having the proof that she indeed did what I asked her of.

Deciding to take a rest after a long while of practice, I sat down, opposite to where she was sitting.

"Why?"

Hearing her voice, I realized that we were the only ones in the room. Our eyes met for the first time in the day, making me feel uneasy.

"Why did you leave me?"

Her voice was quiet and obviously pained, making my heart ache. I wanted to speak but no voice were leaving my mouth. I found it terrible. I wanted to defend myself, I wanted to comfort her, tell her that it'll be over soon.

"Just tell me. Please...!"

(Y/N) pleaded, tears that she was trying to hide forming by the corner of her eyes. It'll be better like this, (Y/N). I just... can't tell you. I just couldn't tell you that it's for your own good. I wanted to speak but everytime, there's something preventing me from doing so.

"I can't."

It was the only thing I could say, even though I had a lot more to say that would probably be stuck in my head for eternity, only there, not to be said.

"What do you mean you can't, Keran?!" I broke our eye contact, as I can't really bear looking at her crying and in pain. Moreso, it's because of me.

"I love you!"

I felt my heart skip. I held it in me, trying not to show any change in my expression.

"You shouldn't love me, (Y/N)."

I kept on preventing her eyes, feeling the tears I was preventing, surface in my eyes. I could feel her stand up, seemingly having to be done with the bullshit I was spitting.

"I know you still love me, Keran!"

She didn't let me say another word, stomping out of the room in frustration. Pure silence remained in the room's atmosphere as I remain sitting in the corner of the room.

"I still do, (Y/N)."

I hugged my knees to my chest as I let all the tears out. "I don't know what to do anymore." I hid my face in my hands, carelessly sobbing. At this point, I didn't really care anymore.

"Keran..." I could hear a sigh emit from the person who just entered the room, but I didn't bother to lift my head up, knowing who it was.

"Yuxin, I don't know what to do." I lift my head up making eye contact with her, who's face remained a few inches away from mine.

"Do what you think is right, Keran. My advice won't help you anyways." Yuxin laughed, but it was obvious that it held no specific emotions.

"But... I don't know." I look up to the ceiling, my sobs getting lighter as I felt a cold bottle of water get placed on my hands. "Drink. Calm down." Yuxin ushers me, as I quietly obey her.

"You're unusually nice today." I changed topic as she raises an eyebrow at me. "Just enjoy it while it lasts." I only hummed, suspecting the something good happened to her.

《》

"Did you also ask Jiaqi to take care of (Y/N)...?"

I caught Yuxin's wrist as we were both in the hallway. She looked at me, confusion evident in her face. "What...? No. Why?" I pursed my lips, shaking my head. I should just be grateful she's taking care of (Y/N).

I just felt conscious, seeing someone being close to her. But then again, who am I to complain? I'm not her lover. I don't have the reason to be jealous.

I shook my head, entering my own practice room. Seeing that it was only me who was late, I hurried over to start.

《》

"I'll be back in a bit," Feeling the need to go to the bathroom, I left the room. My eyes lightened up as I my sight caught a certain girl by the hallways.

Deciding whether to approach her or not, it all went down the drain as I saw her clutch the wall in pain. I didn't think twice, being fast on my feet.

I wrap my arms around her torso, preventing her from hurting herself. I breathed heavily, seemingly having a hard time to breathe with our close proximity.

"(Y/N)...!"

I unconciously shout out her name in panic. I held her tightly, making sure that she won't get a single scratch on her body. I stare at her shut eyes, as she opens her eyes. I kept my arms around (Y/N) as I look into her eyes, my facial expressions filled with concern.

I felt disappointment surge through me as I felt her exert force, pushing me away from her. "I'm sorry" She mutters under her breath as she walks past me. I licked my lips, my actions doing the opposite of what my mind was telling me to do.

"Wait!" I grasped her wrist, preventing her from walking away. Surprised, she look at me with a shocked expression.

'Take care of yourself for me, (Y/N).'

"Nevermind."

I let go of her hand, the warmth leaving as I separate from her touch. I felt nostalgic, remembering all the warmth we shared before. I wanted to say more. No, what am I doing? Why am I being like this?

(Y/N) parted her lips to talk, as I expected something to come out of her mouth. "Okay," I swallowed a lump that was stuck in my throat as I watch her turn her back on me and walk away.