nobody like you (Lauren Jauregui)

i'm sorry

"But, Lauren, you promised-"

"Camz, I don't have the time for this right now. Let's talk about this tonight okay?" Lauren says in annoyance. "I'm gonna be late. See you tonight." She drops a kiss on the frozen brunette's cheek and leaves, arriving in her class just in time before the bell rings.

She starts it as soon as everybody's ready, but gets interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Come in."

She meets the cold blue gaze that she definitely wasn't expecting, and despite the shivers that are going down her spine, she looks into her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I'm late. I missed my bus."

"What's your name?" She asks as she takes her paper.

"Alma."

"Alma Keyes. Thanks for joining us take a seat."

Lauren watches as the girl sits down and the class continues. For some reason, she's a little distracted by the younger girl and she knows how bad it sounds but... There's something about her, that just makes her feel some type of way and she doesn't what it is.

As the bell rings, she looks at her from her desk, waiting until she walks past her.

"Alma, wait. Can you come here for a second?"

"Yeah, sure."

"I would like it if you focused a little more in my class. You're a little too distracted and you aren't following what's going on, plus, I barely ever heard the sound of your voice these past two weeks. I know talking in class can be challenging but yeah, if you could at least just focus and take notes, cause I'm going to start grading you guys' work soon and I'd feel bad if I had to give you a bad grade."

The girl seems distracted still, even if she's looking into Lauren's eyes and nodding.

"Okay, I'm sorry. I'll try and focus a little harder."

"And also I would like you to switch seats and sit right there" she points to the seat right in front of her desk, "because you are too distracted by the outside. That's it, you can go. Have a nice day!" Lauren smiles and Alma grins.

"Thanks. You too."

Lauren is already sick of her routine. It's her first year being a teacher and the conditions she's in are the worst she could've ever imagined. She's so close to getting married but also so close to breaking up with the girl she once thought was the love of her life.

She is sitting here, wondering what went wrong, and when it did, knowing damn well she'll probably never have answers to all of these questions. All she wants is to feel better whether she has to leave her fiancée or not.

And right now, her heart is sinking deeper and deeper at the sight of her camera roll. She's laying on her stomach, on the bed she shares with Camila, and the sight of every picture hurts her.

She remembers of these times way too well. She remembers every little thing she'd feel when Camila's arms would wrap around her, when she'd feel her body right against Camila's, and how good it felt to just be around her.
Fast forward a few years and she despises the moment she has to come home.

So she distracts herself with her work, exercises, assignments, tests, anything she can think of just so she doesn't have to remember the way she can smell Camila from another room. Because she just heard the door close and she only has a few seconds until the Cuban will come to her and God knows what will happen.

They'll probably fight. Lauren isn't in the mood for fighting right now.

But apparently Camila isn't either.

"Heyyyy..." The younger girl says and Lauren gives her a fake smile. "Can we talk?"

"I'm busy."

"I know, but this is getting a little too much for me. And I know it's not easy for you either, this situation is horrible and I want to try and talk it out."

Lauren can only think of one thing right now, and it's the easiest way. She's going to chicken out of this conversation, leave the house and come back later when Camila's asleep.

"Lauren, please, I need you to listen to me."

"I don't want to, Camila! I listened to you so many times, all you do is talk about what happened even though I always tell you that I don't wanna talk about it!" Lauren snaps, and she can feel that in this exact moment something is going to go wrong.

Her feeling comes true when Camila starts to raise her voice.

"The only reason I keep talking about it is because you're still mad at me for it, but somehow you still tell me that you're over it!"

"Why would I tell you that I am over it if I wasn't?! God Camila, you're driving me crazy! I can't stand you when you're like this." Lauren says, getting up and taking her jacket to leave the house.

"Why are you leaving? Is facing me so hard? I should be the one scared to face you, why are you the one leaving?"

"Because you're upsetting, Mila. It has nothing to do with whatever happened, it has to do with everything else. I can't stand being around you anymore!"

"What do you mean?" Camila says, tears threatening to  fall from her eyes as she watches Lauren's glimmering emerald gaze.

"I don't know." The older girl whimpers, closing her eyes as her first tear falls. "I love you so much, Camila, but... This ain't working out. Can't you see it?"

Camila softly nods.

"I can. I can. I just... Figured that if I didn't put that feeling into words then it wouldn't be true."

"But it is true."

Silence falls in the room for a few seconds, and a sob escapes the younger girl's lips.

"I just don't want us to be over."

Lauren can't help but pull her in for a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry that we have to do this. You know it'll only make us feel better."

They stay like this for a little while, and in the blink of an eye, Lauren is in her car, parking for another day of school.

Camila took some of her stuff to go live with her parents for now but eventually she'll have to come back and collect everything else. And although this is breaking her more and more, Lauren can actually feel the healing arriving in her heart a little more everyday.

Maybe it's the fact that she won't have to face Camila that way again. Maybe it's because things are finally over and she regained control of her life again.

She's thinking about it less and less when she's in class, making the contact with her students easier, because she isn't fearing the end of the class anymore. She loves her job again, and her smile is sincere.

She slightly jumps when there's a knock on the door, and she turns her head with a wide grin on her face as the girl enters the room and sits in front of her.

"Hi Alma. You're early!"