UNCUTE . tsukishima kei [✓]

𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍 : 𝗮𝘆𝗼 𝗯𝗶𝘁𝗰𝗵 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝗲

[ third person ]

⋆⋆⋆

"Are you guys ready for dinner?"

"Yeah!"

Yumiko threw the door open and made her way over to the kitchen. Half of the males headed off to wash up a bit while the others helped her prepare the table for dinner.

"Don't put your fucking finger in the food!" Yumiko snapped as she whacked Nishinoya in the head for dipping his finger into the mashed potatoes and eating it. "That's so fucking dirty. You didn't even wash your hands yet."

"Relax, Mom. My hands are clean."

"No, the fuck, they aren't." Yumiko hissed upon seeing the dirt on his palms. "Go wash your hands or no dinner for you. Now."

Nishinoya hung his head, trudging over to the kitchen sink to wash his hands with warm water and soap.

"Wow, school Yumi-chan is so different from home Yumi-chan." Hinata sat down at the table, grabbing one of the table mats that were gathered in the center of the table. "She's kind of scary."

"You can say that again." Suga shivered at the thought of the one time he and the other third years had upset Yumiko. "For future reference, don't put more dishes in the sink after she finishes washing them."

The first years nodded, not wanting to find out what would happen after that.

"Did you wash it good?" Yumiko was sat on the floor beside Yamaguchi with an open spot beside her. Her head tilted upwards to look at Nishinoya who stood there, waiting to get the ok to sit down.

The boy held out his hands, showing his clean and dry palms.

"Okay, you can sit down." As soon as Nishinoya excitedly plopped on his seat, she reached up and patted his back. "Good job, Yuu."

The brunette male flushed bright pink, swatting her hands away when everyone laughed. "Stop treatin' me like a baby!"

"Whatever." Yumiko drawled out, turning away from him with a smile. She clasped her hands together and glanced around the table at all the males who mimicked her movements. "It's nice to have you guys here to join me for dinner hehe."

"Itadakimasu."

"Does anyone want brown gravy? Thank Koushi for bringing so much. I was hoping he'd bring like three packets but instead, he brought a fuckimh whole mountain of it." The female chuckled, serving the males with hot gravy that smelled like heaven. It actually made her mouth water.

"Thank you for the meal, Yumiko-chan." Suga and a few other males said in unison. She simply smiled, waving it off.

"Ayo, bitch, feed me!" Nishinoya joked, opening his mouth to Yumiko who had put down the pot of gravy and picked up a bread roll. He hesitated for a moment when he saw the flat look on her face, "...please."

Tsukishima snickered upon seeing Yumiko stuff the bread roll into Nishinoya's mouth.

"Oh damn, I forgot the drinks. I'll be right back." Yumiko jumped up from her seat, pattering off to the kitchen to retrieve some drinks for the group. Ennoshita followed after to help her carry the drinks.

"Nishinoya, you need to be more respectful to Yumiko-chan. She cooked us this dinner and you called her the b word. Even if it is a joke, you should at least thank her first." The silver haired male chided, shaking his head at Nishinoya who pouted. "Don't you think that would upset her?"

"But..."

"She'd let it slide because she's probably in love with Nishinoya-san." Tsukishima snickered, knowing it wasn't true but wanted to say it to stir up a bit of trouble at the table.

"Huh?" Suga's eyes almost fell out of his head at the sound of that.

Nishinoya was quick to shut that down, "Bro, she's not in love with me. Me and Yumi are bros."

"You only see her as a sister?" Kageyama questioned with raised eyebrows.

"Yup." Nishinoya grinned, "But she's kinda hot, don't you think?"

"Nishinoya-san, that's incest." Tsukishima deadpanned, smirking when everyone nearly choked on their food. His expression returned to its usual indifferent look when Yumiko entered the living room with Ennoshita at her side.

"Chikara is such a manly man." Yumiko started off with a laugh, "He literally picked up a roach that was on the counter and yeeted it out the window. What a man."

"You're being dramatic."

"Why are there so many bugs anyway?" Daichi asked with raised brows.

"Ryuu keeps leaving the back door open so they crawl in." Yumiko explained with a short glare at Tanaka who looked away innocently. "Maybe I should keep Chikara around to fend off the bugs."

"Nishinoya-san has competition then." Tsukishima muttered, catching Yumiko's attention. Nishinoya shot Tsukishima a small glare.

"Shut up and eat, Tsukishima!"

Ennoshita, who had caught onto the entire situation, spoke up, "Actually, Yumiko-chan, aren't your anime guys a lot like Tsukishima?"

Everyone collectively looked over at Yumiko who licked the side of her thumb to catch the gravy that dripped on it. Her eyebrows furrowed, "And how do you know this?"

The male chuckled sheepishly, "I may have seen your room."

"Chikara!" A slap landed on his arm as Yumiko began to scold him for looking into her room without permission- even though she had nothing to hide. "And just because I like anime characters like that, it does not mean I'll end up like Tsukishima. He's also an underclassman, so no. Besides, he's not cute at all."

"Aww, that's gotta sting. Should I go get you some ice?" Tanaka teased, patting Tsukishima's back with more force than was necessary.

The blond shot him a small glare then smirked in Yumiko's direction. "That's fine. I'd never like an ugly girl like you."

"Aw, fuck nah-"

[ t i m e s k i p ]

Yumiko patted her hands dry on her shorts and turned around to see the males loitering near the door. It was as if they were waiting for something. She walked over, raising an eyebrow at the boys who stood there with their shoes on, not exiting the house. "What's wrong? Did you guys leave something?"

"No, we just forgot to say," Everyone bowed, except Tsukishima who did a half-assed lean, "Thank you for the food."

"Ah, you make me blush." She spoke in a staccato way, swatting the air with a cheesy smile on her lips. "You're welcome!"

Everyone made their way out of the door, walking over to the street where they all began to split.

"Hey, Tsukishima!" She called out with a mischievous grin, "You should practice hanging clothes at home. It's embarrassing if you don't know how to something as simple as that. Pfft!"

He scowled, "As if I'll ever listen to a midget who can't even walk properly."

Her soft laughter echoed within the street before she closed the door, disappearing into the kitchen to finish cleaning.

Our first Friday back was a success.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[ a/n : the new episode of haikyuu had me trembling. tsukki is fucking THICC and for WHAT? mans is double cheeked up on a Friday afternoon like it's normal. hella ass. ]