love death love (bxb)

Chapter 31

"I like when you  wear my clothes." Tyler whispered into my ears making me smile.

"And I love wearing your clothes. Even if they look too big on me." I told him, which made him softly laugh.

Tyler started to close his eye's as well. He pulled me a little closer, making me snuggle closer to him in response. Tyler just hummed in response.

"That's what's make's me love it so much." Tyler quietly said, while I listened to his heart beat.

[Currently]

"Jonathan?" Damien said, sounding confused on why I'm standing in front of him.

For the past few day's I've been ignoring and avoiding Damien. I felt guilty about it, but I realized me talking to him, even if we are just friends, makes Tyler uncomfortable. Tyler's constantly trying to change and be a better person for me, so I feel like I should do the same for him.

"Hey. I'm sorry for avoiding you." I told him, looking away while I rubbed my arm, "I just haven't been able to think of the right way to tell you this..." I explained shyly.

We were in the school library. Damien helps out there, by organizing the shelfs and fixing damaged books. He was staring at me with a confused look on his face.

"Tell me what?" He softly asked, while he put a couple books on a shelf.

I just awkwardly thwittled my thumbs around, while I looked at my feet. Damien had a small smile on his face, while he picked up a couple more books. I let out a shaky breath, before speaking.

"I think it's best if we don't talk anymore..." I shyly said out loud, which made Damien stop what he was doing.

Damien looked hurt, but quickly smiled to cover it up. I started to feel more guilty, knowing he probably thinks it's because of something he did. I was going to say something else, but nothing could come out.

"I'm really sorry. Did I do or say something to offend you?" Damien asked quietly, while not being able to look at me.

"No please don't apologize. This is all my fault, not yours." I said panicking, "I knew Tyler wasn't comfortable with you, and I neglected his feelings. And now I'm putting you in an awkward situation, because my selfishness. So I should be the one who's sorry. I'm really sorry Damien." I stated, rubbing my arm again while the guilt ate at me.

Damien's hurt expression, changed to a concerned one. He stopped what he was doing, to look at me. He tilted his head, while he furrowed his eyebrows at me, looking worried. 

"Is Tyler asking you to not be friends with me?" Damien asked, sounding concerned.

I looked up at him and saw how worried he looked for me. My eye's widened, when I realized how the must of sounded to him. I quickly shook my head no, before speaking again.

"No, sorry that sounded bad. Tyler doesn't pressure me to stop doing things for him, which is what I like about him." I quickly told Damien, which made him relax, "I just. I just know how much Tyler has changed for me. Plus with the fact that he also doesn't pressure me to stop doing things,  even if he isn't fond of someone. I just thought, I need to be doing thing's for him as well, even if he isn't asking me too. I shouldn't be neglecting his feelings, so I'm sorry Damien." I tried to explain better, while I looked up at Damien.

Damien looked like he was confused on how he should be feeling. The fact that Damien didn't do anything wrong, but still felt like he had to apologize, made me have a guilty conscience. I wanted to say something again, but couldn't because nothing would come out again.