Chapter 84

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Anastasia POV;

"Right everyone." I call, addressing my pack. "I have split you all into groups. Each group will be led by two experienced pack members. Once in your group, you will train in pairs under the direction of your experienced pack members. This training will place emphasis on fighting in your human form with weapons, as opposed to fighting in your wolf form without. I will now read out the names..." After dividing them all up I assign each group an area of the training ground to spread them out.


I survey the groups as they begin sparring together. I focus my attention more intently on the newest pack members; the King's orders included ensuring that all of our pack members be ready for a fight, including the newest members as their numbers would be vital.


Thirty minutes into the training session, I feel satisfied with the progress the newbies are making, and I take the opportunity I both need and dread.


"Rick. A word." I call, motioning for him to follow me. He falls in step as I walk around the training grounds, still surveying the pairs.


"Ma'am?"


"I need you to take over this session. At the end of the training session, please see that our pack members are well fed and well-rested. I want them prepared for tonight's events."


"Yes Ma'am. Does this have anything to do with your agitation and unease?"


I guess I hadn't been as good at hiding my feelings as I thought. I nod. I half expected this question; it has been plaguing me all afternoon. My loyalties are in turmoil over whether telling Kellen about the pregnancy is the right thing to do.


On the one hand sits the King's order and my duty as a pack leader. On the other, my bond with Kellen and my duty to our future...to our child. The conflict between the two has been chipping away at me all afternoon, tearing my conscience apart all afternoon. Do I tell Kellen I am pregnant, knowing he will want me to stay away from the challenge and protect myself and our child? Yet in so doing disobey the King's order to me as a pack leader to attend and show loyalty to my pack and my Alpha. Not only would I have to betray my Alpha King but turn my back and abandon my pack in a time of need.


Between the headache at the thought of betraying my King, and the overwhelming, crushing weight for abandoning my pack, the fever of both in the interim of leaving the meeting and now is almost more than I can bare.


I have been toiling with the idea of not telling Kellen; in that scenario, he is able to keep his focus on the challenge and not be distracted by my situation. But the nausea and sickening unease from my wolf at keeping secrets from our mate proves just as unbearable as the headache and the weight of responsibility.

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