Her Blood Lost

25| Shame

Remain calm. All you need to do is remain calm.

Julius's POV

Numbness was all I felt as I left the mourning-filled room where Jezebel's parents and pack-mates were sitting vigil.

I was trying to be a respectable alpha. I just wanted to talk to Ian's dad, but unfortunately I was already in turmoil over Jezebel's death, so maybe I was in the wrong to want to have that conversation with him at the time.

But he needed to know what had happened at the festival—needed to know what Markus had done and what Ian had gone through.

Yet as I explained in the small room that was Ian's and his den I was getting nothing short of bored stares and occasional lazy nods from the father. And it was pissing me off.

"Are you sure he didn't start it?" Blaise huffed finally speaking with a sneer and I immediately scowled.

"Excuse me?" I growled out.

"My son doesn't know how to control himself—"

"I suggest you stop with that tone sir. I've already killed a man today, I'm not in the mood for another person pissing me off." I snapped and Blaise tilted his head looking like he wanted to say more, but shut his mouth.

"Your son was being assaulted. Now whether or not you approve of what he does, you could at least comfort him." I spat out, overly annoyed by the blank look I was receiving from Ian's father.

I snarled and shifted into my crimson wolf.

"Julius stop!" Sunchaser's voice yelled and I felt anger swell inside me. I shook my head.

"Stay out of this." I growled then turned my attention back to Blaise.

"Accept him or face me." I spat and bared my fangs. "To reject my beta is to reject me."

"To disrespect my beta is a slap to my face; an insult to my name." I continued and my limbs twitched.

"Julius—"

"It's Alpha. You don't speak to me so informally after such blatant disregard of your own son." I huffed.

"He's a cliché. The beta being gay." Blaise retorted.

"I chose him regardless. And that has nothing to do with him as a person. He is your son."

"I never said he wasn't my son."

"Then why do you look at him like that?! Why do you stare at him like he's disgusting?! Why?!" I snarled and went to launch myself at him, but a body jumped in front of me and held me back. Ian.

He stood in front of me but his head was down, "Julius please stop." He whispered hollowly.

"Because I will not accept the fact that he chooses men over women. Never." Blaise finished and Ian tensed.

Ian's head lowered more and the fur along my back raised.

"Shame on you." I growled and whirled around, knowing it would take all my strength not to attack the man if I looked at him any longer.

"Ian, come with me." I growled as I walked away.

Ian followed quietly as I made my way outside and was soon greeted with an extra set of paw steps trailing me. The air was warm but had a sense of heaviness and I gave my fur a shake.

"Look, I don't know why, but I'm attracted to you." I grumbled as I padded ahead of him.

"...Huh?" Ian gasped sounding flabbergasted and I nodded and kept going forward. After a pause he followed again.

"It doesn't make sense. I've never seen you in that way." I continued as I stared ahead at the trees. I couldn't bring myself to look at him.

Right?

I don't ever remember seeing him in a potential-partner light..,

"Err—Julius I really don't know what to tell you..?" Ian's confused voice said and the fur along my spine suddenly felt as if it had been ruffled.

"Jezebel just died—I don't understand what the hell is going on. My brother is still out there trying to kill me and suddenly I've got some random ass crush on you. This don't make any fucking sense!" I snarled and Ian crept up to stand beside me. He hesitated before he pressed his side to mine and leaned against me.

"Julius you need to calm down. I get you're confused... but you—umm—you'll get through it. You're great and this is probably just some weird instinctual thing going on." Ian said and I glanced to him and felt a churning in my stomach.

"Yeah... weird." I grumbled.

"Yep. Like—hmm—oh!—a female fox. If her mate dies she immediately goes and searches for another partner." Ian said and a frown etched my brows.

"What about a male fox?" I asked both confused and curious.

"Ohh... well the male fox will stay a widow until he dies..." he said sounding a bit discouraged.

"So, you're calling me a female fox?" I asked and Ian pursed his lips.

"Well—yes? It's just an example and hey, I don't even know if it's true. It's just something I read once." He explained and we fell into a silence.

A female fox, are we? Chaos's grumbling chuckle echoed in my head.

Hear that? Even the pup thinks you're a bitch. I scowled at his teasing words, but knew he meant nothing by it.

"Welp... Are you okay—I know today must've been hard with Jezebel, but you can talk to me if you want?" He rumbled softly and I let out a breath.

"I'm not okay, but I'll get over it." I growled.

"Julius—"

"I'll get over it." I snapped and turned swiftly before stalking back towards the house.

But Ian didn't follow me and I didn't look back.

I loved Jezebel.

I love Jezebel.

Update coming soon!

Peace.