✔️ ILLICIT DESIRES | 18 +

Chapter 29

Rita's pov

I woke up feeling hot and exhausted. Sighing, I opened my eyes, wanting to find out why I was feeling so hot. I also felt disoriented for a second before realizing I was lying on top of him — again.

Roman has wrapped his arms around me, holding me very close to his body. My head was nuzzled in the crook of his neck. I looked up to see if he was awake.

His features were relaxed and his eyes were closed, he was still sleeping. Carefully, not to wake him up, I caressed his face, while staring at him adoringly. Honestly, he was a really handsome man.

The shape of his eyebrows, his jawline, his nose were perfect, as if you drew him with a pencil into perfection before pulling him out of the paper to reality.

And his eyes, his eyes were the most fascinating part of him. I'd never confess it to him and boost his ego, but I loved the blue of his eyes, even if they looked cold and hollow when he was pissed off, which he was often, like yesterday when I called 9-1-1.

I knew it was dangerous to play with him the way I did. I saw the death in his eyes — my death. He would be my butcher, if I said the truth to the person on the line.

I not only angered him but also frustrated him, by unintentionally walking around only in his shirt. And got in return what I was asking for — rough sex.

He wasn't gentle, let alone satiable. He could go on between my legs for hours, but seeing how tired I was he showed me mercy.

I didn't regret at all that he was my first — the man who killed my husband at my wedding night and had me at gunpoint many times.

But things have changed. I got to know him a little. And I knew I was safe with him. I was so grateful for meeting him.

He saved me from a terrible life with Nicolai. Putting his life on danger, he was protecting me from everyone wanting me dead. He literally offered me a chance to start a new life — a normal life.

Still, I wouldn't be able to trust anyone, like I trusted him. Knowing that we live in a small world, the chances of me getting found out alive and killed was there.

However, I wanted to experience life to the fullest — including sex with a man who I trusted enough to know he won't hurt me.

And I got what I wanted. It was painful — like I had expected my first time to be — but also pleasurable.

However, I wasn't nearly prepared for his kinks. He literally penetrated me with a handle of a knife that was thick, but nothing compared to his cock, which got harder every time I called him daddy.

I blushed at he erotic memories in my mind. Even though I got myself involved with him for experience, I got more in the end — I got affection.

His eyes didn't only reflect lust, when he had my naked body under him, but also care. He was careful not to cut me with the knife — that he didn't hurt me.

Even though he was insatiable, rough and not very gentle at all once he was inside me, but he didn't leave me after getting to his peaks.

He washed me — his hands tracing softly on my body. He hugged me, something I wouldn't expect him to do in my wildest dreams. Then, he literally panicked, thinking he had hurt me.

Sad thing to say, but he showed me more affection than my family did in my whole life. So, I no longer wanted only experience.

Acting greedy, I wanted to see more of his affectionate side, because I liked the feeling of being wanted. I felt welcomed. I felt accepted. I felt appreciated. And I would give him more of me — of my body — to see more of his gentle side.