Fire & Ice - A Draco Malfoy fanfiction

Chapter 50 - Do you remember what you said to me on the night of my birthday?

I wanted to write down exactly what I felt, but somehow the paper stayed empty and I could not have described it any better.

- wtm

I wish I could say that things got so much better over the next few weeks, but I'd be lying if I said that.

Draco didn't ignore me and whenever we were alone, he'd try to use that time to his advantage, but we weren't alone very often. It wasn't like he wasn't interested or that he didn't have feelings for me anymore, he had just found something else that acquired ninety-nine percent of his attention. He only showed up for patrol about half the time and it seemed as if his mind was entirely somewhere else every time.

I saw him during breakfast, lunch and supper, if he decided to show, but I couldn't talk to him then with Snape around and in class, which wasn't the most ideal setting either. But during all the moments in between, he was gone. Either researching in the library, which I didn't want to interrupt, or off Merlin knows where.

And he didn't tell me anything. I knew why he didn't: he felt like this was something that he had to complete alone. He wanted to succeed, to prove his worth and he wanted to do it without anyone's help, but it was driving us apart and I hated it.

I could keep myself busy without him as I had homework to occupy me for months, but I missed him. Every time I saw Tracey and Blaise flirting with each other, I longed for the summer. I longed for the days that his focus was on me and not on this stupid task.

And although I could keep myself busy, my mind was an entirely different matter. I both worried about him and I felt anger. I was angry that he didn't try harder, that he didn't keep the promise he had made during the summer, but that anger seemed to disappear every time I saw him. He wasn't eating well and he looked absolutely miserable.

And what I was hearing didn't improve my mood either. He was lacking on his homework, something that he'd usually never do and he had given up his position as Seeker on the Slytherin quidditch team. Draco loved quidditch. I couldn't help but worry.

But I'd get him to talk to me. I hadn't yet because the inner diva in me was butthurt that he was paying so little attention to me, but the Hogsmeade date was coming up as the end of October neared and I'd finally have one full day where I had Draco to myself. And we'd start the day by having a firm talk.

"I don't think I'll be wearing this dress", I chuckled as I picked out the dress I had let Daphne borrow last year for her date with Draco.

"What's Draco's favourite colour?" Tracey asked, helping me pick out an outfit.

"Black, of course, but not for dresses. He thinks black dresses are too basic. He liked the one I wore at the Christmas ball at the Ministry. It was quite girly, surprisingly."

"Oh the man has a specific taste, high maintenance", Tracey chuckled, picking out a nude-brown dress with small ruffles at the bottom and at the sleeves. I hadn't worn it in forever.

"This could be cute with your coat and some stockings", she mumbled.

"Oh, yeah, I like that", Daphne joined in, selecting some jewellery. I wondered if Draco would like it too. I shook those absurd thoughts from my brain. I liked it and that was all that mattered.

"Come on, let's head to breakfast", Tracey announced, dragging us to the Great Hall.

I smiled slightly as I noticed Draco at the other end of the Slytherin table. His plate of food seemed to be untouched, but I'd make sure he'd eat plenty throughout the day. If he wasn't taking care of himself, I would.