A hundred silent ways

Chapter 23

Amarha sat against the headboard of her bed, lost in her thoughts. Was it true that Allah Almighty Showed a sign when you couldn't make a decision? Was her mother right when she said that dreams carried a clue from the Creator?

She had been following the steps her mother had asked her to since the last three nights but usually what she dreamt would be forgotten when woken up and those which she remembered probably carried no meaning. She sighed and slipped underneath the covers after doing the nawafil once again. After a long shift at hospital which included constant standing and working, falling asleep wasn't a hard task.

Her eyes flickered open to a bright light only to find herself standing dumbly in the beginning of a street, that fell into a long array of houses on both sides. That street seemed to be interminable as she walked in the same direction. Under the glare of dazzling sun she felt sweat beads come out of her forehead pores and she, with the rough fabric of her tissue dupatta, wiped it off. Why on Earth was she wearing a tissue dupatta? Her throat went parched and her eyes squinted whenever she looked up to see the bright blue sky.

Suddenly the atmosphere changed as she no longer saw a street and houses in it, but a ground, vast and gigantic. Where cerulean of ether clashed with the ceaselessness of land.

Her eyes stopped at a tree in the distance that could provide her some shade. Without a second thought she started striding towards it. Holding the piece of cloth above her head with her frail fingers so that it doesn't blow away. As she stepped into the shadow she felt like she found a lost piece of her. She fell down against the trunk to catch her breath.

Wind cradled her and she closed her eyes peacefully when she felt a feathery touch on her eyebrows. Her eyes opened to find a man sitting beside her, leaning against the broad trunk of the ancient tree. He was holding a tray in his lap in which fruits of many types were present, her eyes stopping at the bright colour of pineapple.

For a moment she wanted to flinch back which she surprisingly didn't. Her thin dupatta fluttered with the slight wind bringing her out of the reverie and she breathed out shakily, "Yousaf?"

He, with the most beautiful smile forwarded the tray to her and she jumped back, with her both palms placed on dusted ground, supporting her weight.

She jolted up in her bed and opened her eyes to the darkness. What was it? A dream? She had dreamt! Her eyes moistened as she replayed the flashbacks. The slow moving fan on ceiling made her realise how drenched she was with sweat as her eyes searched for some water .

***

In the evening she closed the door wearily of her carry and walked to the steel gate of her house where in the doorstep Khadija was sitting. A pink stroller with her fluffy baby doll lying in it, was standing beside her. The dying sun's rays falling on her. Few curly strands of her hair had come out of her ponytail and were now clung to her neck and forehead due to perspiration. It wasn't summer but one couldn't sit under the sun as well.

"Khadija what are you doing?"

"Where is my chocolate?" The six year old asked, her cheeks flushed as Amarha lined her lips and knelt down in front of her.

"You promised to bring one." She whined.

"I have brought one but first go inside. And take that stroller along!"

Inside, the family was having their meal. Amarha sat quiet which was unlikely to happen because she often used to chant about her day, the varieties of people she met. Her eyes were droopy whilst she toyed with the food in her plate. The fact that the patient, she had been working on since so many days, died was killing her inside. Being a doctor you are adviced to be feeling-less and to not create an emotional attachment with your patient but some were exception and her disturbed sleep from last night was an addition.