You told me a few weeks ago that you finally deleted ours and my pictures off your phone. You said it was because you were trying to move on from the past and because there was a girl you were interested in and didn't want her to see the pictures. I told you I understood, but what you don't know is after we hung out I went home and I cried. It did hurt, but I did in fact understand. It opened my eyes to the fact that you have officially moved on and it made me realize something that I did not want to ever realize, there is nothing for me to hold onto anymore.
Your heart is no longer mine and I can't hide in the comfort of me taking up space in your phone anymore. You deleted everything, you deleted me.
I've obviously had a few weeks to think about all this, and within these few weeks we even stopped talking, but it is what it is.
I knew I wasn't over you yet, but I was trying even though I didn't want to. I had to keep trying, because it's the right thing to do. The right thing to do for you and most importantly the right thing to do for me. I'm still not fully over you and you're still the last thing on my mind at night and the first thing on my mind in the morning. I don't know how to stop thinking about you or missing you. I guess right now, I am just high off the emotions of distancing myself so I don't get in the way of any of your future relationships and of trying to better myself as a person considering the issues that I will carry forever.
Today though something came to my mind that immediately broke my heart. You finally deleted the pictures off your phone, there is no trace of me on there. But, does that mean you finally threw out the birthday card I made you and the love notes and doodles I gave you too? This question didn't cross my mind a few weeks ago, but it did today. I don't know why it did, but when it did I felt that all too familiar pain in my gut.
I don't have the answer to that and as much as I want to know, I don't.
It all just is in fact what it is...
