Addicted.

Chapter 8

Styling your hair in your classical sleek bun with a striking red lipstick to match, you were finally ready for your second encounter with Bellatrix. Despite everything seeming the same, something felt different this time. You didn't feel as though you were going to meet a murderous psychotic killer with a suspected histrionic personality disorder, you felt as though you were going to meet a girl. An impressionable young girl, who'd been led down a trail of darkness, manipulation and lies from such a young age. A girl, who despite everything she'd done and the crimes she'd committed, still had a small chance at redemption. 

The journey there was fairly short. Shorter than you'd originally expected. Once you were near to Azkaban, you were talked through the same rules. 'Report back' and 'Don't distract the dement-' blah de blah de blah.. everything you already knew and didn't need repeating. Stepping out of the carriage, you walked confidently down the halls of Azkaban much differently to how you'd done previously, hearing your heels hit the cold wet floor with every step you took. You then came to a corridor. Similar to before but entirely different. You spun around starting to get  panicked at where you were, feeling completely lost. The confidence you felt originally walking down the corridor left your body. Your breathing became rapid with each and every breath becoming harder to take.

"Nice to see you my itty bitty girl" you heard a voice cackle. You quickly turned around, a wave of fear quickly rushing through your veins and up your spine. "Oh are these sessions a regular thing now.. Am I in dire need of a psychiatrist Y/N?" she laughed again. You knew from this evil, high pitched laugh who this was. There was now a door. A door that you'd seen before but had not been there originally when you entered the walls of Azkaban for the second time. On the door, there was a hatch that was conveniently slid open. On the other side of the door, was Bellatrix. Her dark eyes and her head tilted. A smirk widening across her face as she peered up at you, her eyes glistening with wonder and disbelief. "I'm glad to see you're enjoying our sessions, Madame Lestrange" you said, smiling back as you opened the door which led you to the little area that separated you and the witch. "Toujours Pur, Y/N" she grinned. This was clearly another language that you didn't know or understand but still wrote it down anyway.

"Today, I'd like to talk more about your childhood more specifically your time at Hogwarts which from research I've done prior to our session I can understand is a touchy subject therefore feel free for us to stop at any time" you said, looking directly at her. You couldn't help but notice that despite the dirt, the untameable hair and the decaying of her teeth, she was indeed quite pretty. If she looked like this in Azkaban, you couldn't imagine what she'd have looked like previously. "Lets see.. you were sorted into the house of Slytherin in.. 1961? you said, looking up at her. "1962" she frowned. "My apologies.. you had acquaintances with the following.. Severus Snape , Rabastan Lestrange um Evan Rosier and Lucius Malfoy? All of whom except Lucius became Death Eaters during the Wizarding War" you said to which she laughed in response. "Is something funny, Mrs Lestrange" you asked, feeling the temper inside you bubble. She then remained silent which you hated. You laughed. "You do realise that under Section 43 of the Ministry's act of protection, I have been given permission to use the curse Imperio if you do not provide me with the information I require, Bellatrix" you snarled, getting angry and angrier to which she responded by laughing hysterically. "Has my little lamb never used an unforgivable curse before?" she taunted. 

"What sort of question is that of course I haven't.." you stammered, feeling your cheeks get redder and your skin get hotter. "You could be ever so powerful Y/N with the right guidance.. with the right support" she whispered. "S-stop" you shouted, before pulling your wand from its case and pointing it directly at her. She reacted by pressing her pale, clear skin against the glass. "By the way, if you're going to use an unforgivable curse you've got to mean them, Y/N and by your unsteady wrist-" she said, referring to your trembling hand. "I doubt you've got what it takes" she purred. "IMP-" you stammered. She was right. Of course she was right. You were talented. You were skilled but you didn't mean it.. you didn't want to hurt her or control her  You'd found yourself warming to her, starting to become more understanding of her situation and you hated it. You hated how weak it made you feel. 

Despite all the precautions you'd taken, she'd still found a way to control you. To get to you. After your attempt at using the failed curse on Bellatrix, you'd never felt more embarrassed or as defeated. It caused a great sense of unhappiness to form over you once you'd gotten back to the Academy. If you couldn't get a little bit of information out of someone like Bellatrix despite being given permission to use the curse which literally had the ability for the victim to be placed under the castors control if and only when performed correctly. You became less motivated and less driven to do well for your end of term exams which your professors clearly noticed. Dozens of meetings were arranged and it was thought best that until you'd filed your report on Bellatrix Black Lestrange for the Ministry, your studies were to be postponed.

This allowed you to devote one hundred percent of your time towards the case in order to secure your position within the Ministry for after you left the academy. In order to fully recover and regain your confidence, you took a few days break to visit your parents in Scotland which allowed you to consider your choices and have time away from Bellatrix and the troubles of Azkaban. Once you'd arrived back, you were way more focused. Countless notes you'd made on Bellatrix were written up and placed all over your desk trying to make sense of the situation. 'Toujours Pur' was a phrase that was driving you crazy. No one had heard of it. Not the girls at the Academy. Not Madame Deveraux. It appeared that it was an older, more ancient language that not many had heard of. It then came to your attention that Bellatrix was a member of one of the most ancient and sacred wizarding families known to your kind the noble house of Black. Could it be that this was a phrase only spoken or known to members of House Black?

Finally, after weeks of nothing, you'd got the little snippet of information you'd needed. The book you'd found prior to this the one titled 'NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK' which showed the Black family tree also showed something else. On the crest of the house, there were two words painted in a golden swirl. They read 'Toujours Pur'. It eventually came to your attention that this was the Black Family motto which translated to 'always pure'. What the hell did that mean? If it was a reference to your blood type, yes you were classed as 'pureblood' not that that made you any superior to muggle-borns or half-bloods but it did lead you to wonder why she'd said it. Was this some sort of kindness that Bellatrix was showing by referencing to your purity?