Sunshine [Owen Joyner]

28.

ahahahahaha
enjoy.

Owen and I returned from Florida a couple of days after the wedding. We got in some quality time with Charlie before we came back to California and he returned to Canada. It was so nice getting to see him and spend time with him again, but by the time I got back home, I was mentally exhausted. My social battery had officially drained.

I had an unspoken agreement with Owen that we would take a few days off from hanging out with each other, mostly because we've been together for literal weeks and I think that we could both use a little break. I can't speak for Owen, but I am an extremely introverted person and every once in a while I can't help but distance myself from everyone and sit alone for a few days. Some people would call that self-sabotage, but I'm a personal big fan of isolating myself from the world. So that's exactly what I did. I sat on my couch for several days in a row, Phantom the only thing there to keep me company.

I didn't mind it at all. I did find myself missing Owen, but not enough to do something about it. We texted every once in a while, but neither of us made any effort to hang out.

I didn't make an effort because I was afraid. I'm afraid of what he told me at the wedding, and we still haven't talked about it. It's been a week.

I was also waiting for him to make an effort to speak to me first, which he hasn't done in days now. I still don't know why.

I also still don't know if that was him confessing his feelings for me at the wedding or if he was just drunkenly messing around. Either way, I'm too much of a coward to ask him about it after he shut me down the first time.

Part of me is wondering if he's avoiding me because of what he said. Another part of me is convinced that he's finally had enough of me and is sick of being friends with me.

I have no idea. But again, I'm too much of a coward to find out. I'll let him come to me, if he wants to. And if he doesn't want to, then so be it. 

As I'm cleaning up my apartment, which is well needed after nearly a week of wallowing in my own filth, my music cuts out due to a phone call. My heart jumps, hoping it's the one person I actually want to speak to, but it's not.

It's someone I haven't spoken to in well over a year. Someone I haven't wanted to speak to in well over a year.

I furrow my eyebrows, deciding whether or not I should answer. I ultimately choose to answer the call, my stupid curiosity getting the best of me. Why is he calling?

"Hello?" I answer, trying to sound confident.

"Hey..." his voice trails off, I can tell he's looking for words to say. "How are you, Joey?"

"Uh, I'm doing great, thanks," I respond, still confused as to why I'm on the phone with this man right now. "What's going on? Is something wrong?"

"No, everything's fine. I..I'm uh, I'm in the LA area. I was wondering if you...maybe like to get together and...I don't know. Catch up? We could grab lunch, or coffee or something?"

I let out a sigh. I can practically picture him nervously scratching at the back of his neck. It's something Owen always does too.

"Ethan..." it's my turn to trail off when I find myself at a loss for words.

It's not every day your ex-boyfriend calls you out of the blue and asks you to hang out.

"You can say no!" He rushes out so quickly that I almost laugh. "I don't know...I just figured it would be nice to catch up, but seriously no pressure. You can hang up on me, and I'll never reach out again. Just..give me a yes or no?"