𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐒𝐨 𝐈𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭 |𝐃.𝐌 (re-write)

FORTY-SEVEN

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E L I Z A

I woke up with nothing but the memory of Draco's touch still lingering on my skin. Every time I said goodbye to him, It felt like it was for the last time. I never told him and never showed it on my face but I fear that whenever he and I part ways, it'll be for the last time. Ever since Noah stabbed me I've been living in constant fear.

Fear stays by my side all day and attacks me at night in my nightmares. I haven't been sleeping much either, which is why I lay awake while Daphne and Pansy slept like peaceful little lambs.

The second we arrived home this morning we went straight to bed and as soon as their heads hit their pillows, they were out cold. At first, I tried to sleep but every time I closed my eyes, all I saw was Noah.

A reckless part of me wished I drank more at that party last night. A part of me wished I drank so much that I passed out. At least then I'd be able to get a wink of sleep. Instead, I lay awake, staring up at my ceiling and listening to the sounds of Daphne and Pansy in deep, peaceful sleep.

~

The morning seemed to be moving in slow motion. Or maybe it was just me and my head. Honestly, during breakfast, I felt like I was invisible. Daphne and my mum were in conversation about something. At first, they spoke about the florists in Diagon Alley and then they were speaking about Daphne's mother's hobby of knitting and my sweet mother told Daphne how she'd always wanted to learn to knit.

All while Pansy was digging into her second round of pancakes and I still sat with my first round, untouched. My father had walked in a while ago to grab a coffee, his only good morning to me was his hand ruffling the top of my head.

"Are you going to eat your breakfast, Darling?" my mother's voice broke through the hazy surface of my mind. My eyes shot up to her and saw three weary eyes on me.

I forced a smile, breaking the barrier of the ache in my mind, and picked up a syrup-covered strawberry.

My mother smiled but her eyes still bore that same worry. I couldn't help but feel bad, I am my mother's treasure but I'm not sparkling anymore. I've lost my spark, the thought intruded my mind and my eyes suddenly felt teary.

I looked down at my plate and picked up another strawberry as my mother's voice said, "Would you like some water or anything?"

"I'm alright, thank you," I said.

"If you're not, that's okay, just please let me know," my mother smiled.

"Or us," Daphne said kindly, "we are all here for you."

It was growing harder to lie and keep this smile on my lips as I looked between my mother's, Daphne's and Pansy's eyes.

"You don't need to worry about me," I promised them and looked away. With that, the conversation was over.

~

Daphne and Pansy went home around two in the afternoon. We went on a walk to the stables and they met Ellie. We spoke about the party and about school and thankfully Noah wasn't brought up. I could tell they desperately wanted to talk about him but every time they tried to start the conversation about him, I avoided it and changed the subject.