Chapter 41

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**YOUR POV**
Instead it was nurse Olivia's head that popped around the door. She was wheeling in what looked like a laptop. She placed it to the side of my bed and started unhooking wires attached to thick round pads.
„How are you feeling now?" she asked while she prepared the machine.

„Alright." I nodded. I was far from alright but didn't want to cause any more trouble than I already had.
The nurse attached two big plastic discs to my belly with weird elastic bands. She adjusted the bands until I heard the sound of my babies heartbeat.

„How does that feel?" she asked looking at me and waiting for an answer.

„Okay." I said laying down and trying to get myself in a better position. I laid on my side and put a pillow between my legs to make it more comfortable.

„Okay, I'll leave you for a while, everything seems good for now." she said while she looked at the paper that was coming out of the little printer underneath the laptop.

„Just buzz if you need anything and doctor Cooper will be here shortly. Oh and we didn't manage to reach your partner but we will keep trying." she told me and walked out of the room.

„Any luck?" I asked Gemma who was sitting on a little couch staring at both of our phones.
„No." she answered immediately.
„How fucking difficult is it to get hold of Harry Styles?" I asked starting to get more nervous every second.
„You mean how difficult is it to get hold of the whole band One Direction." Gemma added still trying to contact all of them. She was clearly worried and annoyed that nobody answered our calls.

„My brother is gonna shit himself when he finally looks at his phone and sees the hundred missed calls." Gemma said.

„They clearly have their phones on silent or not with them." I quietly said.
„What if something happened to him and that's why I can't reach him?" I said starting to think about horrible scenarios.
Tears began falling down my face at the thought of that.

„Shhhh don't think that, if something happened at least someone would pick up the phone or would call us." Gemma said and sat down on my bed in front of me.

„I just want him to be here." I sobbed with my face full of tears.
„I don't want to do this alone."

„You're not alone Y/n, I'm here for as long as you need me. I'm here for you."

„I don't want to do this without him. I don't know how to do  this without him." I let out with a raspy voice from the tears.
Gemma gently rubbed my leg trying to comfort me when the constant drum of my babies heartbeat had dipped for a moment as the numbers on the laptop sceen began to drop.
„Is that normal?" I asked Gemma who was looking at the machine too.
„I have no idea." she said not taking her eyes off of the monitor.

I stared at the machine, hoping the numbers would change. After a few seconds the familiar sound of my babies heartbeat kicked back in and the numbers started to rise again.

Suddenly the door opened and doctor Cooper walked in.
„Y/n how are you and the baby?" she asked.
„Ok, but the monitor just did a weird thing." I said pointing to the laptop.

„Oh..." She said and got closer to the machine to take a look at the paper that came out of the printer.

„Did you feel any pain when the numbers dropped here?" she asked.
„No." I said shaking my head.
„Has that something to do with the fall yesterday?" I asked wanting desperately to know if all of this was my fault.
„No, certainly not but I'd like to leave you on the trace for a while longer so I can see what's really going on in there." she said smiling at me.
„Just don't eat anything and try not to drink too much. Small sips of water is fine but no more. I'll come back later again." she added and then left the room.

I never saw her this worried. During every appointment I had she was so calm and even yesterday when I fell, she handled everything so calm. But now, it's totally different.

I checked my phone to see if anyone answered but nothing, no answer from Harry. I was worried about something I didn't even know my baby had without the one person I needed by my side now.

„It's happening again." Gemma murmured in warning but I was already staring at the screen.
„It's the third time in less than 35 minutes." I said.
The numbers dropped, the heartbeat slowed down for a few seconds before it got back to normal.

„I think you should buzz for the nurse, something is not right." Gemma said as she sat on a chair next to me.
Time passed slowly but still, we were in the hospital now for almost three hours. We spent the time trying to reach Harry and the boys and hoping everything would go back to normal.
The only person we could reach was Anne. I filled her in and she tried to calm me down as I started crying on the phone.

„I know someting is wrong but I know that when I buzz now, they will be here quick and confirm that somethings wrong  and I'm not ready for this without getting a hold of Harry."
„Press the button now, or I'll press it for you." Gemma said and got up to get to the remote.

I picked up the remote and laid my thumb over the red button, shut my eyes and pressed it.
Only a few moments passed and I heard the door open and nurse Olivia entered together with doctor Cooper.

„Everything alright honey?" Nurse Olivia asked as she came over and looked together at the paper again.

„The numbers have dropped for the third time now." I told them.

The nurse put a thick cuff around my arm to measure my blood pressure.
„Blood pressure is climbing." she told doctor Cooper.
She nodded and turned back to me.
„Ok Y/n we have a couple of options, but the main thing is that I don't want to leave this baby in there for very much longer."

I felt like passing out as soon as she said that. It was too soon, I still had another five weeks to go.

„But it's too early." Gemma said out loud what I was thinking again.

„It's earlier than we prefer but that doesn't guarantee complications. The baby is full grown at 32 weeks and you are 35 weeks pregnant so that wouldn't be a problem, there are other factors though, lung maturity is the biggest at this stage but we have solutions for that. The baby might needs a little extra oxygen when it comes out and that means a little stay in the NICU but that's not anything to worry about. We have all the facilities here to assist the baby on delivery." she explained.

„It would mean we have to do a c-section. The heartbeat is dropping because the baby is in distress, that could be because it gets not enough oxygen because the placenta isn't working properly. Which is something I can't allow to go on much longer. I know it's a lot to process but I'd like to schedule you in for the c-section in the next hour."

I literally couldn't think straight anymore. It was like someone physically hurt me by saying this. It's too soon for my little baby to come out. I looked down at my bump and placed my hands on it.

„We're struggling to get in touch with Harry, the father." Gemma took over for me as she saw I couldn't talk anymore.
„What happens if we can't get him here in time?" she asked.

„We can keep trying to contact him for you of course and I can hold off an hour but that's as far as I'm willing to." doctor Cooper said.

„What happens now?" I asked.

„I'll give you a little space and time to process the information then nurse Olivia will come back and prep you for surgery and I'll come back later to talk to you about how the surgery will be performed. As I said before don't eat or drink anything." was the last thing she said and they both left the room.
I jumped up of the bed and made it to the bathroom just in time to empty my stomach. Gemma ran after me and held my hair back. After I got back up on my feet I washed my mouth and went back to my bed as tears filled my face again.

„He is not going to be here for the birth of his baby." I cried out. It hurt my heart saying this.

„I'll do everything I can to get him here in time." Gemma said and hugged me tight.

How could I go through this without him...without the love of my life by my side....He was the only person I wanted by my side at this very moment but he wasn't anywhere to find...

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