evergreen • remus lupin

74. talking

september 19, 1977

The marauders had Astronomy last period, which of course took place at midnight, so after lunch they only had to drag through history of magic before their free period, but history of magic felt long enough for two classes.

So they decided to go to the library during their free period to finish up their dark cloud constellations essay which was due that night. 

It was there they heard a bunch of sixth years talking two tables over.

"Didn't she get sent to go see Dumbledore?"

"Yeah, apparently she had an outburst in Divination" it was this that peaked Remus' interest in the conversation. 

He knew Selene had Divination currently, and given the current climate, and rate at which gossip spread he could bet that if there was drama, it involved her. 

"What did you say?" his head snapped towards the girls, who immediately shut up

"Nothing" the one finally spoke

"Yeah mind your own business" the other added, but they already told him all he needed to know

"Let's go" Remus said quickly gathering his astronomy books and leaving quickly, the marauders following behind. 

"Moony what's going on?" James asked as they all hurried out of the library

"Didn't you hear them, someone in Divination got sent to Dumbledore?" he answered, James understood and hurried along with him. 

When they reached the Headmaster's tower Selene was walking away from Dumbledore's office, looking angry. 

"Sel" he called out, catching her gaze

"What are you guys doing here?" she asked

"We heard you were here" Sirius spoke up

"You gotta be..." she trailed off huffing in anger

"What are you doing here?"

"I went on a homocidal rampage during divination and killed Elisabeth McLaird" she snarked

"You what?!" Sirius yelled

"Thickhead, she didn't actually" James slapped him in the back of the head. 

"What actually happened?" Peter asked

"She was being a bitch and didn't want to sit next to me... created a whole scene, it was not my fault."

"I'm sure it wasn't" Remus told her "Are you okay now?"

"Yeah, I'm fine"

"How did Dumbledore take it?" James asked

"Don't start with him" she rolled her eyes

"Why what happened?" he asked

"I told him it wasn't my fault, but I knew what he thought of me anyway"

"Damn, what'd he say?"

"That he believes I have good intentions in the war" she mocked his wise voice

"Isn't that a good thing?" Peter asked

"Not they way he said it. He was implying that even though I had good intentions, I was still just the daughter of two death eaters. He also called me paranoid and a liar"

"Bloody hell, really?" James asked

"Yes and it's really pissing me off right now"

"Why don't you come with us to the library?" Remus suggested

"In a little, I need a fag" she said pulling a pack out of her bag, 

"We'll meet you guys back at the library" Sirius nodded, as he James and Peter turned back in the direction of the library

"Didn't you used to shag Elisabeth McLaird?" Peter snorted once they were out of earshot

"Shut up it was one time" Sirius tried not to laugh

"No it wasn't" James laughed.

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Back in the courtyard, under the grey clouds, Selene took a long drag from the cigarette, feeling the warm smoke in her lungs. Remus stood against the wall next to her also smoking. 

"It's only been two weeks" she sighed, exhaling smoke

"Hm?" Remus asked

"We've been in school for two weeks, and I'm already about to pitch myself off the astronomy tower,"

"I know it sucks" Remus felt bad because there wasn't much he could do in this situation to help her, it just sucked.

The feeling of helplessness in both of them was weighing heavily on their minds. Time seemed to be moving in slow motioned. Days dragged on for eternity, and when the day was finally over, all they could do was fall asleep and do it all again tomorrow. 

It was exhausting to be caught in the endless time loop they were in. And while time was moving so slow, it was also moving so fast. It was seventh year. Their childhood was ending, after this year, it was the real world, and the war. 

And all the emotions were piling far too high inside them.

"I mean do I even need an education, I'll probably die in the war anyway" she rolled her eyes, watching the dead leaves get carried through the grounds by the wind

"Don't say that" he nudged her arm

"It's true though! There's no one guaranteeing us safety. We're just kids we shouldn't have to fight in a fucking war"

"No. We shouldn't, it's really not fair, but you'll always have me, and James, and Sirius and Peter, and war or not that's enough for me"

"Merlin Lupin you make me sound like such a bitch" she laughed.

"I don't think you're a bitch" he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close and kissing her temple.

"I do"

"You think I'm a bitch?" he asked

"No I think I'm a bitch" she clarified

"Okay darling" he patted her head. Selene finished her cigarette and dropped it on the stone at her feet, crushing it under her boot. 

"When's the next quidditch game?" she asked 

"I think this Friday."

"Fuck why is that so far away" she groaned

"Why?"

"I need to get blackout drunk as soon as possible"  

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1k words

ugh i'm so sorry this is another short chapter my brain is literally not functioning right now

feel free to give me ideas of stuff you want to see in the story because i'm so lost right now

we also just hit like 64k guys i cannot thank you enough this story has become bigger than i ever thought it would be you're all amazing 

also my messages are always open if anyone needs to talk <3

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