It's Okay, Draco

Chapter 43

Holding Draco's ring that was on my necklace, I took two deep breaths before stepping out of the Hogwarts Express, not that I don't want to be with my father, I do, more than anything, it's the broken look on his face when he sees me that I don't wish to see, seeing my parents like that had always affected me, and now with my mother gone...

When I saw him, he managed a smile to me, a small one, couldn't really tell if it was a true smile or he was pretending to be okay, but I still returned the smile back.

He looked so thin and pale, almost like he was ill, and I felt a familiar pain hit my chest at the sight of it.

The trip home was quiet, I was wondering how my father managed all these months alone, making me regret a bit of my choice of coming back at Hogwarts...not that I could go back in time and change that, what was done was done, so I shoved that thought deep in my mind.

I flinched when I saw the current state of my house, all the frames that contained a picture of my mother were placed down, against the cold marble floor, making my heart flinch.

I've never seen my house so full of dust like it was now, the furniture looked completely untouched since I left, and the living room looked way more messier.

There were lots of dirty dishes were on the countertop of the kitchen, it was hard to found a clean dish among all that mess.

I climbed the stairs to my room, still not sharing a word with my father, not to be rude, buto think of how to talk with him, normally, trying to bring back our relationship, even though these hard circumstances.

As soon as I stepped inside my room, I saw, the earrings, my mother's earrings, I have left them on the top of my table when I went to the Malfoy's Christmas party, and didn't had the courage to touch them again, hoping it would still have her warm touch inside of it.

Taking my eyes off the earrings, trying to drive my mind off the terrible day my mother left me, and looked over my desk.

Opened letters were laying there, Draco's letters, and some unfinished that I expected to sent him, but wasn't capable of such thing, and always got the letters stained in tears, which mixing with the ink and making an all mess.

From there, I drove my gaze to my window, and stepped towards there, slowly staring at the beautiful flower field...they were dying as well.

If I ever felt comfortable among these walls, thar feeling had vanished, my mother was who bringed the colors to these antiquated and musty walls, but now all had gotten grey, the rainbow who dropped the life to this house had faded away, and now I felt a complete strange in a place I once called home.

I layed in my bed, looking at the ceiling, thinking of all that's it's been happening, while twisting Draco's ring between my fingers.

My father had losted the joy of being in this house, a house that my mother so much admired, always with her decorations all over the house, he had losted his smile, like I had, but slowly was recovering, half of his soul layed now in the heaven, while the other remained in hell, broken, uncompleted.

I tried to understand why my father had hidden away my mother's pictures, and that's when I realized.

My father had covered my mother's pictures, because, he couldn't bare to look at her face, to look at what he had lost, the woman he loved for years...he feels guilty for what happened...as so I felt too.

There was so much stories I hadn't shared with my mother, so many important moments in my life I didn't got the opportunity to confess, all because I was too worried of what would happen to my mother, instead of trying to pass time with her, like a daughter and her mother should do.