It was always you

Breakdown

"You want us to act like partners?" Emerson asked once again, the disbelief evident in his voice. The shock had worn off for me, but it seemed Emerson was still grappling with the absurdity of the situation. I tried to block out their conversation by tapping on my phone, focusing on anything but the discussion that was bound to make me break down.

Whatever their decision, if it benefited the kids' future, I would accept it. But pretending to be in love with my ex-boyfriend was the last thing I wanted to do.

"Sally, we're discussing your future here, and you're busy on your phone," my mother snapped, jolting me out of my thoughts. I rolled my eyes, unable to help myself.

"I didn't raise you to roll your eyes at me," she scolded. The room fell silent, and I set my phone aside, knowing it was time to speak for myself.

"Mom, I never thought your love for your grandkids would overshadow your love for your daughter," I began, my voice trembling. "Since the day my brother passed away, your love for me has deteriorated. Taking guardianship of Peter and Lily was one of the worst decisions of my life." The words spilled out before I could stop them, the weight of my feelings too much to bear.

"Your obsession was at its peak when you asked me to marry Ethan. You wanted that good-for-nothing moron to be the father of these kids. I'll thank the heavens for sending that kidnapper, otherwise, I don't even know where I'd be right now." My vision blurred, tears threatening to fall.

I glanced at my mother, seeing the pity in her eyes. I missed the woman she used to be before my brother's death. She was my everything because Dad was always busy with Camila and my brother. When my brother was gone, all the responsibility fell on my shoulders, and they started expecting too much from me.

"You're asking me to do something out of my comfort zone again, Mom. I can raise the kids alone without any assistance." I stood up, knowing if I said more, I'd break down completely. Everyone looked at me with worry, and I wasn't prepared to meet Emerson's gaze. But my traitorous eyes found him, and he was already looking at me with an unfathomable expression.

"I'm leaving," I said, turning my back on them, letting the tears fall freely.

"Wait, Sally! There's a thunderstorm outside. Spend the night here in your room and leave tomorrow," my dad urged. I cursed myself for agreeing to attend this dinner despite the weather forecast. I nodded and headed to my room, closing the door behind me and finally letting myself cry.

I didn't know why I was crying. Was it because of Emerson, or because I was sick of everything that had happened in my life? I asked God to let everything be fine.

I must have fallen asleep at the doorway because when I woke up, it was already dark. I switched on the lights, changed into comfortable clothes, and freshened up. It had been years since I last stayed here. I avoided living with my parents because they always gave me suggestions that were out of my comfort zone and constantly compared me to my stepsister, Camila.

As I opened my closet, nightdress wardrobe, numerous contents spilled onto the floor. I remembered keeping my journals and novels there when I was a teenager. Writing a journal was a daily routine, and I had written at least ten journals by then. I changed into a purple shirt and pajama, deciding to revisit my teenage years—the golden years of my life.

I couldn't sleep because of the thunder and the knowledge that my ex-boyfriend was in the same house. I sat on my comfortable bed, opened the nightlight, and began to read one of my old journals.

Dear Diary,

I met someone today,
Who, I believe, is my mate.
I find him everywhere I go,
I think he is completely eligible to fill the empty place my heart had for a lover.
He's eligible to be the prince charming to my Cinderella...