Chapter 15: Fixing A Hole
4 Sept 1967
It had been over a week since Brian had passed. Things haven't been the same.. Once we came home the lads met at Paul's to discuss their future and all. Not much has been said to us women, but we understand that they're grieving.
Other than that, my little Zak had just turned two. Oh my little man's so big now! We had the family over on Saturday to celebrate. It was strange though, more quiet than usual. We all expected Eppy to walk through the door and Zak to go running to him..that never happened.
"Are you sure you don't mind watching them?"
"We'll be fine, nothing I haven't handled with you and your brothers when you were younger."
Today Ritchie and I were leaving to go to New York to see my specialist. Let's just say we're very anxious to get there.
"Pam, love the car's ready."
I nodded as Ritchie and I went over to the kids.
"Be good for Grandpa and Angie..we'll be home soon."
"No go.."
I kissed Zak's forehead and held him tightly to me.
"You'll be okay baby boy, you'll have fun here."
I hugged him then went over and kissed the twins's foreheads. Soon my dad came up behind me, taking me tight into his arms.
"The first word you get from the doctor you call, ye hear? I worry about my little girl."
I held him close to me, not really wanting to let go.
"I promise I will, but I'll be fine..I'm just getting them removed."
"Still, your old dad wants an update every so often. You hear that Richard?"
Ritchie sat James back down with Cadence and came over to us.
"Yes I do, I promise we'll call. Now we should get going, it's going to be a long plane ride."
My dad nodded and picked up Zak.
"We'll see you soon.. Wave bye-bye to Mummy and Daddy."
He waved back at us sadly. I couldn't stand the look on his little face..I didn't want to leave my babies..
Ritchie took my hand as we left the house, got into the car and our driver took us to the airport.
Once arriving we boarded onto the plane and we were off. I curled up on my chair as Ritchie pulled himself closer to me.
"What if I do have cancer? What if it's gotten worse and it is positive? The kids are so young.."
He put his finger under my chin and tilted my head up so I was looking at him.
"Ye need to listen to me, nothing's going to happen to you. We've been going to your check ups with Doctor Kingston and he said that it seems to be looking good. And it hasn't spread at all. I promise ye that you'll be fine, I won't let anything happen to you."
I nodded slowly as I buried my face in his chest. He rubbed my back soothingly as he kissed the top of my head.
"I'm sorry..for all of this..Ritchie I'm just beyond nervous. I've been having horrible nightmares about what happened to Mum..I guess it just has me on edge."
"I promise you'll be fine baby..now just go to sleep.. We have a long plane ride."
I closed my eyes and slowly began to drift off. It didn't seem like much later until I was woken up again.
