CONFUNDUS; harry potter [UNDER EDITION]

CHAPTER SEVENTY-ONE

Vega is too good at schooling her emotions. Years in the field, he thinks, or maybe it wasn't bad he accepted Harry back into his life. He can't be sure. She scribbles a lot in that little notebook and Lucca wishes he could just see. Is she insulting him? Maybe she wrote this fucking piece of shit can't move from his ex boyfriend someone kill me I don't get paid enough or maybe she is doodling because Lucca hasn't stopped talking for the past fifteen minutes. She's probably counting how many times Harry's name was dropped since the start of the session. Twenty seven. Lucca counted. He's a bit insane. But she can't blame him. His emotions are all over the place in the past week.

Or maybe Vega is wondering how the fuck so much happened when she saw him last week. Just seven days of difference and Lucca brought a whole new box of traumas and insecurities to work on.

At this point Lucca thinks she isn't even listening. He wouldn't blame her. It's tiring to listen to him. But he has to talk about everything. He should have called her the second Harry crossed that door. He didn't. He was afraid Vega would tell him he should reject Harry. And Lucca would have tell her to go fuck herself.

It wouldn't be the first time a therapist tells him what to do and Lucca gets angry about it.

He was never good at following orders.

"And Harry's portkey is scheduled for the fifth of October. He already spoke to Celia and Remus (who aren't his legal guardians but I reckon they both act like ones since they're the last living friends his parents had). He'll stay with them since Celia found a Mind Healer who is trustworthy enough for Harry to go. He doesn't want to be alone."

Vega finally looks up at him, her hazel eyes narrowed behind her spectacles. "Is it bad he is leaving?"

"No," Lucca replies at once. "But I'd want him to stay longer."

"Why?"

"Because I'll miss him."

"Is that the only reason?"

Lucca gives in. "I'm afraid he may find someone better," he whispers. He feels lame, ridiculous even. He wanted them to stay as friends. "And I know I said it'd be for the best if we're friends for now but... What if he is in love with someone else when I'm ready to move on?"

"What is holding you back?" Vega asks. "I know you said you aren't emotionally ready for a relationship because you fear it will get in between your treatment but..." she leans in, an odd smile on her face. "I think you've done good so far, Lucca."

That is a surprise.

"You do?" He asks.

"You controlled the situation from the beginning. Meanwhile many emotional moments happened between you two in the past week... You are still placing yourself first, ignoring the secondary desire to please Harry in a romantic way," Vega says. "It's an improvement. The Lucca I met four months ago wanted to go back to England to apologise, now, this Lucca I have right here," and she gestures at him, "asks his former partner for space and time, which is an amazing choice Harry respects."

Vega interlocks her hands on her lap, glancing up and down at Lucca, analysing him.

"I think," she begins, taking a little pause to add suspense. "I think you can work a good healthy relationship if you two continue talking and respecting each other's times and spaces. Harry wants to leave now, right?"

"Yes."

"And you want him to stay."

"Yes."

"But you didn't tell him to stay."