CONFUNDUS; harry potter [UNDER EDITION]

CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

HARRY

It's ironic how Harry has been wishing more than anything to be ignored by the whole school at the moment and yet, the only person whose attention he desires, ignores him.

Lucca laughs at something Terry says. An awful sensation settles in his chest. Harry watches how freely Terry slides his arm around Lucca's shoulders and whispers in his ear, they both crackle, and Aurora snaps at them. Harry knows it is probably nothing. Lucca and Terry are touchy and clingy, they have always been.

What it actually bothers Harry is that none seems to notice Lucca's plate is empty.

He grips his knife, focusing on the way Padma attempts to serve him yet Lucca waves her off. She doesn't insist. She should. Lucca mustn't skip meals. It's been near two years since the curse but hell, Lucca can't go back to old habits.

Hermione peers over the Ravenclaw table, still too resented about the book, and murmurs. "Maybe you should go and apologise to him instead of just staring."

Ron scowls. "Why Harry has to apologise? He was trying help him."

"Honestly, Ronald, don't you see why Lucca is upset?" Hermione hisses. "He feels humiliated."

Harry stabs his chicken furiously. He doesn't need Hermione reading Lucca's body language. It bothers him. Harry knows his boyfriend, he knows he is angry at him because he stepped in. Harry shouldn't have to but he needed to — hasn't anyone else saw the terror in his face? Hasn't anyone really noticed Lucca was scared?

"He's being dramatic, Hermione."

"He is not dramatic."

Actually, Lucca is the next thing to dramatic. He invented drama, if possible.

But this isn't about that. Harry hurt his pride. And he must mend it before Lucca changes his mind about, well, Harry. Their relationship is rare, a moment they are flying steadily and the next one something pulls them into a sharp dive. They had disagreements before, Harry had said hurtful things and Lucca ignored him for days. And somehow, this feels completely different. Everything feels different about Lucca.

After that night at the Department of Mysteries, Harry is worried how drastically Lucca changed. Of course he wouldn't be the bubbly giddy boy Harry fell for. Nevertheless, Harry sees the way Lucca pretends he is fine, even when he is not. He can't bear his fake grins, his forced laughter and casual chattering. Do his friends notice this? Or is it just Harry who sees behind that mask?

Harry sees the exact moment Lucca leaves, dismissing Aurora and Terry, both frowning slightly and then sharing a look. Harry watches him walk out of the Great Hall — he doesn't move. Lucca needs space.

Hermione huffs and continues her meal. She is probably wondering how they have managed to stay together this long, almost a year. No. In five days it would be officially a year — on the 8thof September. Harry remembers this because Lucca cares about anniversaries and dates and all that romantic stuff. Which is why Harry has to push his fear aside (ironic, right?) and talk to him.

Not saying a word to Ron or Hermione, he stands up.

Just about leaving the Great Hall, Harry and Milan collide. She smiles, too forced, and places a hand on his shoulder. Harry senses Milan isn't in her usual cheery mood.

"If you are the reason why Lucca hasn't eaten anything all day, better fix it," she says sweetly, her nails dig into Harry's clothes. He gulps, feeling her coldness penetrate his robes. "Lucca mustn't skip meals."