losing game || d.m.

32: sciamachy

sciamachy: (n.) a battle against imaginary enemies

——-

I don't need it. I ate yesterday morning.

"You can have it," I gave Theo a superficial smile "I'm not hungry."

"You sure?" Theo asked with raised eyebrows.

"Positive." I reassured him while sliding the scone over to him.

"Williams, are you drinking black coffee?" Blaise asked while sitting down across from me.

"Ya," I shrugged. "I figured I should try to have less sugar."

It's been three weeks since Granger's comment, and I've taken to cutting meals. Although, it's not working. From the looks of it, I've only gotten bigger.

"Do you want to go to Hogsmeade today?" Daphne asked me.

"Sure," I replied "we have to get dresses for midsummer anyways."

"Wait," Carter butted into our conversation "can we come too? There's nothing to do here on the weekends."

"I mean sure," Daphne turned her attention to the dirty blond. "You guys just can't be in the same place as us when we're trying on dresses. It's tradition that Draco and Theo don't see our dresses until our entrance to the ball."

"Deal." Carter nodded his head.

"I'm going back to the dorms to take a shower." I declared while standing up from the table.

I walked back to the dorm, and by the time I made it, I had to take a second to catch my breath. I really need to start working out and getting into shape again.

Once my breathing was even once again, I got into the shower. Every time I ran my fingers through my hair, clumps would pull out and fall to the shower floor. I ignored it and continued on with my shower.

Everything was fine until a wave of exhaustion ran over me. My heart rate immediately spiked, my legs felt like they were going to give out, and my face got hot. The feeling was suffocating, and my tears mixed in with the shower water pouring onto me. I sank to the floor of the shower, a hand over my heart in an attempt to slow down the rapid beating. Slowly, I crawled over to the knob of the shower and turned the water off before slumping against the wall.

After Merlin knows how long, I heard the dorm room door open and close. I pulled myself off the floor and got out of the shower, taking the clumps of hair with me. Immediately, I threw away the hair. Gross.

I pulled on a skirt and a crew neck, cast a drying charm on my hair, and moisturized my legs before exiting the bathroom.

"Hi," Daphne smiled when I walked into our room. "It's the end of May, y'know, you're gonna be really hot in that."

"It's so comfortable though." I pointed out while sitting on the floor to put on makeup.

Lying to my friends has been getting easier and easier. They're harmless lies, no one gets hurt. I just don't want them to worry about me.

"We're leaving in 20 minutes," she announced while pulling on her own outfit "the boys wanted to have dinner here tonight."

"Ok," I muttered while applying bronzer to my cheekbones. "Do I look flushed out? I feel like I've been looking so dead lately."

"No," Daphne observed my face through the mirror, "you look beautiful as always."

"You're too nice for your own good," I rolled my eyes. "I know you saw how corpse-like I looked before starting my makeup. Do you have blush I can borrow?"