Disillusioned

Chapter Nineteen - No-one Likes Hospital

I pace the waiting room. Up and down. I am freaking out because I haven’t spoken to Riya in a while and the last thing I said to her wasn’t nice. I didn’t want to talk to Riya; I couldn’t stomach even seeing her. Now I would give anything to talk to her. The hospital is so loud people talking so much I just want to tell them to shut up I want silence, it’s not their fault I am just angry, upset and bitter at the moment. I messaged my mother, Dean and Jacinta. So I hope that someone comes here soon. They were either at work or out. My pacing through the waiting room is getting faster and faster. I see my mother coming around the corner. I walk towards her and she gives me a huge hug. I feel so safe, although I am an adult now when my mother hugs me it still makes me feel safe. I think even when I am much older I will always have this feeling of safety when my mother is near. She starts crying. I start crying. I never cry. In my life I have never needed to cry, except when I saw Charlie with another lady, and now Riya. I am normally the strong one. The one that all my friends come to lean a shoulder on. I am not the first for advice but always the first to lend a helping hand.

“I am so sorry mum, it is all my fault,” I say.

“Don’t be silly Tyler it’s not your fault, accidents happen” Miranda says.

“We had a fight about something and I wouldn’t talk to her I kept walking away” I say, “What if she doesn’t wake up now, I won’t get to talk to her again”

“Tyler you need to be strong for your sister, she will get through this you have to be positive and everything will be fine” Miranda says.

I don’t know if she believes that herself, but it is her job as a mother to try and keep everything together right? I feel my energy slipping away I don’t like that I can’t do anything about this or fix it in the slightest way. I have messed up big time with Riya and in result I have gotten her hurt.

“Sit down Tyler” Miranda says.

I sit down on the nearest chair. My lower back still hurts from Charlie. Who to my surprise still isn’t here? Good I am glad. Riya wouldn’t want him here anyway. I turn to my left and see a lady with a newborn in her arms just waiting. I wonder if there is something wrong with the baby or she is here for something else. It makes me think that even at birth we are so venerable to everything and that we need our parents to look after us. I have been very lucky to have my mother look after me if it wasn’t for her I am sure we wouldn’t be living the life we have been. My mother has tears in her eyes but she hasn’t completely broken down and made herself a mess. She is cool and keeping her composure, although I can see behind that all she is hurting inside a lot. I wish I could fix this. I should make a time machine and go back in time and talk to Riya, then beat the living shit out of Saxon because I feel like this has added more fuel to the fire; I hate him more so then ever.

“You should go to the little café down the stairs and grab something to eat Tyler” Miranda says.

“Sure I will, did you want anything?” I ask.

“No thank you just get yourself something” Miranda says.

She hands me some money. I feel bad but I forgot my wallet so I take her money anyways. I head down the hallway to the elevator. I make my way down to the café and I look around to see what food they have. Nothing that really excites me. I hear a voice that is quite familiar.

“Those two drinks thanks”

I look over and see Jacinta and Dean getting drinks from the counter. I walk over so relieved to see them. They turn around and they both give me a hug. I start getting upset again. It’s just a normal thing that happens, whenever something bad happens and you see different people the feeling of being upset comes back again every time you see someone.