𝙱𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝙸 𝙴𝚜𝚌𝚊𝚙𝚎 || ✔

𝙸𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚞𝚍𝚎

__________

Changes 

They might drive you half-insane,

 but it's killing you to stay the same,

 but it's all going to work out, it's all going to work out someday

_________

I wring my hands, pulling and twisting my fingers. The memories of Kayden keep me on edge, and his status constantly changes from my master to my captor.

Who was he?

I don't even know anymore. My memories of him are morphed and make no sense. He loved me, and I betrayed him. That's set. That's constant. 

I got hurt by his words and his actions but, somehow, I feel like they made me stronger. They made me more fierce, more resistant, more careful.

I didn't mind being his slave because he changed me. He made me the center of his world. He wanted me to rely on him, and that made me happy. He hurt me because I meant something to him, not just because he liked to see me in pain.

Maybe I am delusional. But, maybe, him taking me away was my destiny. A turning point in my life. 

It makes me feel sick when I realize that I wanted him to treat me like his slave and that I wanted to give up all control to him, be completely dependent on him, which is something that I might never understand, let alone anyone else. I don't know if that makes him my master, but I wanted him to hurt me more, and praise me even better when I did well.

That probably makes me pathetic, but my lust for his appreciation and his approval is uncontrollable. His control over me, however, makes me calm and rested. I am at peace when I am with him.

I want him. There is an unbreakable string that has bound me to him, but I don't know if I need him. What Lee says, what Caroline says, what everyone says: maybe they are right. I know Kayden changed me...

But was it for the better or for the worse?

The End.

Author's Note:

Okay, okay, sorry. This is not the end, but it is a milestone in the book. Call it the end of part 1. I will start publishing the second part from Saturday, and that will show the second half of Sierra's life, what she becomes after the kidnapping, how she handles the world after having dealt with her feelings for Kayden. And what happens next.

Any requests? Let me know and I will put that in the book.

See you on the other side!