It Should Have Been Like This

Book Five: enough

Rominic's viewpoint

   I thought her death drove me mad, but I was wrong. That was just me acting erratic. The silent treatment she forced me to give her however, drove me completely nuts. It wasn't easy walking into the wards of my children and ignoring the beauty sitting there, pretending like I didn't exist.

   So many times I wanted to compliment her outfit because even if it was poor, it still looked good on her. It got harder at each passing day with the way her skin became brighter and her body back to it former glory. Not former though, a whole new glory. I couldn't talk to her, but I made sure to prevent every means of her leaving without me finding out. I gave her a choice to leave or stay, but we both knew the real choice was stay or stay.

I was trying my best to take it easy with her.

   As predicted by my best friend who still thinks I'm an ass, she fell for the offer to become my PA, just to destroy me. It wasn't nice to know why she was really working for me, but I didn't have a choice and Phineas did assure me that she wouldn't do anything.

   "Okay, why don't you offer her a job?" He had asked, rolling my pen between his fingers. "She can be your personal assistant,"

   I snorted outrageously. "And why would she agree to work for me?"

   "And why would she not?" He asked back, "she obviously hates your gut, the offer would be too tempting to resist."

   "How is being my PA tempting? She doesn't want anything to do with me! In fact, breathing in the same air with me seem to suffocate her! So tell me, Phineas, why would she agree to work for me when she can't stand me?" I said sardonically. Shouted most of the way.

   "Because she hates you and want you dead. Her hate for you would make her accept because then, she would have a way to pay you back for all you did. It's revenge brought to her in a platter of gold." He said cheerfully, spreading his arms to prove an invisible point.

   "And how is that suppose to make me feel any better? That she would agree to work for me just so she can kill me!"

   "It's not, but it is certainly making me feel better," he laughed. I deadpanned him, causing him to choke on his laughter, "oh, come on, man, it's funny. Do you wanna know why? Because you are the one whose head she wants, not mine. Just picture her axing your head," he continued to laugh.

   "Phineas, stop being a pain and be serious! I'm having a real crisis here! The only way to get the children to completely accept me is through their mother. My first son and daughter are probably harboring my funeral song in their hearts, especially the boy!"

   "I'm amuse. Do you expect them to just forgive you like that? Especially her?" He chuckled, but not his usual playful one, "you ruined her life, her family, her career, her destiny..." I winced at his painful reminder, "better listen. Her father disowned her because of you. Her stepmother died of heart attack because of you. Her sibling died as well and because of you, her brothers went into stealing to provide for the family. Where are they now? One got shot in a raid, the other in jail and her father died a miserable drunk. She doesn't even know about that part and she already hates you. Now imagine what she would do when she finds out. You ruined her, man, you ruined her already unhappy family. You know sorry is never going to be enough to make up for what you did, ever."

   "I know, I know," I said sadly, burying my face into my palms. "But what am I going to do? I don't know how to get her to forgive me. Phineas, I want her back, I want her forgiveness, I want my children to forgive me..."