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Mammon - Dummy

"Err, long division...what's long division again?" Mammon says, a perplexed look on his face. You sighed. "You learn it in, like, 5th-6th grade. How the hell haven't you learned it yet?" You say, with a tone of annoyance.

You have been trying to teach Mammon some simpler math techniques, but he hasn't benefited at all from anything in the past 5 hours that you've been trying to get through to him.

"You know what? I think you're probably a bit too tired for this. C'mon, we're going on an adventure to your bed." You say. Mammon blushed intensely. "W-WHAT?!" He yelled. "NOT LIKE THAT, DAMN IT!" Now your face was hot.

You sighed again. Poor baby has his head in the gutter all the time, except for the common occasion that he implies he was your first, in which case he finds it completely fine to say so. It goes right over his head.

You crawl under his blankets, but you still feel somewhat cold. You look over at Mammon, who's getting up to come over to you. You turn over, making sure he is extra ready to steal you away and give you cuddles.

You've found that pretending to look away makes him more greedy for your attention, and he will literally GRAB you if you look away for too long. Sure enough, you heard some rustling and some low growls from Mammon. He seemed upset you took your eyes off him.

You felt your shirt lift a little and something really hot wrapping around your waist. It was Mammon's arm. A few moments later, he wrapped the other around you. You were pulled towards him, and felt comforted by how warm he was.

"Actually, I think I learned something today, MC." This surprised you a bit. "Hm? What is it?" You asked, quite interested in what the answer may be. "I learned that you're really good at math."

This made you giggle a bit. However, it wasn't necessarily an unreasonable answer choice, considering that this was the one and only, The Great Mammon. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. Everything felt peaceful.

You were about to fall asleep, when suddenly someone was knocking at the door. Pretending to be asleep, you two ignored it. The knocks got louder. You heard a sigh that sounded like Satan's, and heard footsteps leaving the area.

"Shit."

Well, that didn't sound good. "What's wrong?" You asked, concern lacing each word. Mammon turned you around and said, "It's my turn to pay the damned electricity bill."

You were dumbfounded. "They make you pay bills too?" He nodded. "But why? Aren't you, like, Mona Megistus level broke??" He looked confused.

"Who is that?" Mammon asked. "Don't worry about it." Suddenly, Mammon's door was swung open. It startled both of you, and you thought it was Satan, but it was actually Levi. He sniffled.

"I'm not doing any more bosses with you, (Y/N)." You were shocked. "But why?!" You yelled. "You really had the sheer nerve to compare the Majestic Mona Megistus to this lowlife who doesn't even pay the bills." He sighed.

"But likeeee...you're still helping me with Cicin mages later." You giggled. "Yes ma'am.." He closed the door. You had bullied (not really) Levi into this by making a pact with him. He loved you as a bestie, sure, but his pact made things infuriating for him.

"Slicing mages??" You had almost forgotten Mammon was there. You were also surprised Levi hadn't noticed you were cuddling. Normally, he'd be so jealous that words couldn't even describe how he felt.

"Cicin, and they're from a game." He was quiet for a split second. "I should've known this was about you and that nerd, why do you guys play games together so much and we don't spend as much time together? It's unfair, I'm your first anyway." He huffed.

"There you are, with that I'm your first talk again. You still don't realize how wrong that sounds, do you?" You asked. You were surprised that he was still innocent, but also got flustered at the idea of you in his bed.

"W-well umm, I may or may not have looked that up at some point a couple of days ago, actually..." He was looking away now. "Oh? And what did you find?" He was still avoiding eye contact.

"I'm not gonna talk about it!" He said this like a child, his cheeks puffing up after he said it and everything. You chuckled. "I won't make you tell me, but just know it's your fault if I brag about you being my first at some point."

"Wait a minute!-" You cut him off by putting your hand over his mouth so he couldn't speak anymore. He was blushing a little bit. "Come here, dumbass. I wouldn't actually do that." He sighed again. "Fine."

And that's how you persuaded him into staying in the little spoon position.

Omg I am SO sorry this fic is so dry and it's been MONTHS since I posted the last chapter bc I've been busy so pls take this for now I'm trying to make up for it and I made this in like 15 minutes