Chapter 190

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The sound of the Potters house is deafening.

Sirius feels panic rise in his chest at the yelling and chaos, his breaths becoming shallow. But then the hand he's holding squeezes his, reminding him. She's here. She's okay.

They're okay.

Gwen had resolved her panic, had schooled her emotions and her expression into one of acceptance and determination. And Sirius was still trying to feel confident, trying not to panic. But it was hitting him now. War, fighting. Death. Death. It was hitting him hard and all at once.

"I need to go find Lily," Gwen says, breaking his train of thought. He looks down and finds that she's already staring up at him with kind eyes. She knows he's scared. He's grateful she doesn't mention it. He nods reluctantly, craning his neck to press a chaste kiss to her lips. He mutters uncertainly, "You aren't going to leave without me?"

"Of course not," Gwen answers immediately, squeezing his hand again and reassuring, "I'm going to find Lily, and then I'll come right back to you. I promise."

"Okay," Sirius sighs, pressing one more kiss to her lips before they let go and dive into different directions of the crowd. There's people Sirius had never even seen before, crowding the hallways and kitchen and living room. He looks around, searching for anyone he recognizes. His eyes light up in recognition finally and then he's shouting, "Oi, McKinnon!"

Marlene's head whips up, her face morphing into an expression of relief. He grins slightly, the adrenaline of the room slowly easing his anxiety alongside the Scottish witch's voice as she cries, "It's bloody good to see you! James is looking all over for you! Check the library!"

Sirius quickly nods, pushing through the thrum of Order members to get to the library. He finds James easily, leaning over the desk with Remus and Peter and Alastor Moody by his side.

"James!" He calls, rushing over. He feels a rush of relief at the sight of his best mates, James' grin still cheeky as he says, "Padfoot, kind of you to join us. Have fun with your sexcapades?"

Alastor shoots James a disapproving look, but Sirius is already elbowing him in the side. He asks hurriedly, "Where's mum?"

Dorcas Meadows sounds from behind him, causing him to whirl around and face her as she says warmly above the loud voices, "Mia and Monty are gathering supplies for us all. This was unexpected—"

"Unexpected," Alastor scoffs, everyone's attention returning to the Auror as he nearly shouts, "This was fucking covered up!"

"We can't do anything about that now," Remus insists, his face set in a stony look of acceptance. Sirius recognizes it. To the world, he looks ready. But his friend is just about as scared as he feels. Remus is scared too, and he can't help but find it comforting.

"Where's Ninnie?"

Sirius' head lifts at Peter's question, his heart twisting uneasily as he says, "I don't know. She went to find Lily."

James nods, and Dorcas speaks up again, advising, "Lily and Little were in the dining room last I checked. Little's been brewing potions and calling in favors from people I've never even heard of. He's brilliant, Sirius. Truly."

He suddenly feels a swell of pride, his heart easing at the Ravenclaw's words. His brother. His brother, the former death eater and pure blood prince. Sirius hesitates for a brief moment, glancing at the map laid out on the desk. James catches him looking and urges, "Go get her, Sirius. Bring her back here. We don't have long before we have to go."

He turns to find his Veela, clasping Dorcas on the shoulder and hurrying back out into the frantic preparations for the fight. There were wands and potions and robes strewn everywhere, people grabbing talismans and objects he'd never seen before. Sirius ignores the curiosity plaguing his mind, instead pushing open the doors to the dining room.

He sees Regulus first, standing over a cauldron with frazzled eyes and a look of concentration. Though he's quickly distracted by the heated argument taking place just behind his brother.

"What do you mean I can't go?!"

Gwen blinks at the fiery red head, saying flatly, "I didn't realize I needed to explain. It seems relatively easy to comprehend."

Lily let's out an exasperated cry, her hands lifting in the air as she insists, "I'm of better use out there than I am here! I'm a better dueler than a healer and—"

"And the answer is still no."

Sirius quirks a brow when Lily looks his way, demanding, "Could you please tell her that she's not my mother?!"

Sirius hesitates, his eyes lingering on Lily before he looks at the Veela. He can tell Gwen is on edge, hears it in the sharpness of her voice when she says firmly, "I won't say it again, Lily."

"Could I at least have a reason?" Lily sighs frustratedly, tugging anxiously at her hair. She pauses when the Veela's eyes grow soft and her hands extend forward. Gwen hold Lily's shoulders, pleading, "Lily, please. Please just stay here. Don't make me get James—"

"Miss. Whitlock, if I may."

Sirius whips his head around, eyeing the haggard appearance of Albus Dumbledore with surprise. The headmaster looks exhausted, pained even. His smile is tight lipped, not quite reaching his eyes as he says, "Miss. Evans, while I do agree that your dueling expertise could be of great use, I have to ask, has Miss. Whitlock ever given you a reason to question her motives?"

Lily stares at the headmaster, her face twisting as she finally relents, "I have plenty of questions...but no. She hasn't."

"Then it's decided," Dumbledore says gently. "You'll stay here and help Mr. Black."

Regulus doesn't even look up from his potion making, just grunts in acknowledgement. Sirius looks on suspiciously between the Veela and Lily, watching curiously when Gwen suddenly pulls Lily into a hug. Some words are shared between them, words Sirius can't here, but then Gwen is pulling away and turning to face him.

She walks over quickly, looking up at Albus and asking worriedly, "Is it—"

"It's starting. The Prewetts are already there, as is Edgar Bones and Frank and Alice. They're leading the first wave, but they haven't shown their faces yet. Just the mark. I was only coming to make sure you received my message and to warn Alastor,"

The Headmaster's eyes linger on the Veela, but then he's looking at Sirius as he muses uncomfortably, "Perhaps you should stay back as well, Gwenyth."

The Veela of Hogwarts stares at the headmaster for a few moments, the silence tense. And Sirius wishes, just for a moment, that she would stay back and help Lily and Reggie. That she would avoid this fight, sit this one out. But then she's opening her mouth and saying simply,

"No, thank you."

The Headmaster nods stiffly, like he too wishes that Gwenyth would stay back. But then he's gone, startling Regulus from his potioneering with the loud 'pop' of apparation. The Veela quickly grabs Sirius' hand, calling over her shoulder, "Bye, Little! Don't miss me too terribly!"

"As if," comes the snarky reply, barely heard by them as they hurry back to the library. The map is gone from the desk, tucked away somewhere safe, and Sirius begins to feel the nervousness again. The fear. He squeezes Gwen's hand, smiling slightly when Alastor Moody grins at the sight of the blonde being.

"Aren't you glad I implored you you to join us?" Gwen wonders nonchalantly, earning confused looks from James and Remus.

The Auror grunts, rolling his eyes and muttering, "I'll be glad when we all don't die. Cmon, then everyone! Keep your wands up and your backs to a wall, and for the love of Merlin, don't try to be a hero."

Sirius looks down at the Veela meaningfully at the Auror's last words, finding that she's already staring at him with narrowed eyes. She scoffs at his obvious implication, her lips twitching as she says, "As if a Ravenclaw would ever get the chance to be a hero."

Sirius grins, his courage growing as she continues,

"Everyone knows Gryffindors have to save the day before anyone else can."

{{I know some people might not like this all, but I find it so exciting! Writing fight scenes is hard, but I find that a lot of stories don't include these moments from the first wizarding war. Hopefully you guys are enjoying...even though you're probably nervous (; }}

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