TIME AFTER TIME ; jjk

20

Chapter 20

JEON JUNGKOOK'S POV

Taehyung was right. I used to like a girl back then, used to make me feel crazy without her knowing. But I had everything under control and did my best to ignore and regarded it as a passing emotion. Something that would stray far away. Would disappear if shrugged off. I had never told anyone because I wasn't planning on doing anything about it. I just couldn't do it. Too scared. Never had been ready for it so even when I had heard rumors that Aera liked me, too, I avoided her even more. Eventually I got over the whole thing when we started our internship. Did not see her too often. Too busy to wonder if I could finally grab the chance to be with her.

I was firmly decisive on the girl I liked too much.

So why was I being impulsive on someone I wasn't romantically attracted to?

Soohyun recovered from the shock and disbelief, pressing her lips together as she stared at me in what felt like dismay, and my heart was in my throat now that she wasn't saying anything at all to break the awkward silence in the air. Hard to decode. I counted seconds in my head, peered down at my hands to find them trembling. I knew I instantly had a room for trouble. Soohyun chuckled, and I felt even more hefty like something had pinned down on me.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked a stupid question. You're probably mad and I can't blame you—"

"No, no. I'm just sad..." she said, her voice weak. I stiffened as I watched her tilt her head as if she was studying me, wondering how I could say something so big yet held no meaning. "Do you just feel like kissing someone now and you know that I'm right here, and that's convenient for you?"

I was left with no words to say. The shame from the previous moment forcefully slammed into my body and had me scrambling for something to hold onto. I hated that Soohyun's voice was filled with nothing but disappointment.

"I'm sorry..." was all I could muster.

"Jungkook."

"I'm sorry if I made you feel like I'm taking advantage of this situation." This moment just proved how dumb I was dealing with practical scenarios and making adult decisions.

"I hope this doesn't make our friendship awkward again... And as much as I don't want to admit this to you, I feel like I need to clear this up. I really like Namjoon and I don't want to ruin what we have right now. Not that I assume you have something going for me."

I feigned a smile, feeling both relieved and sad. Relieved that she was trying to make it easier for me and not to drift away from our blossoming friendship. Sad that I had tarnished what we have and made it weird for her. "I know."

. . .

"I miss hanging out with Soohyun," Taehyung said while he was sorting out some documents. I lifted my gaze and was once again reminded me of my stupidity. I sat across from him, thinking of something else but failed. I leaned back against my seat.

"We can visit her and ask her to go out with us after work," I suggested.

"Would you really come? Every time I ask you if you have something to do after work, you tell me you're going to bed," he commented absently.

"I won't refuse this time. Besides, it's been weeks since we haven't talked personally to Soohyun. And we owe it to her to help her have fun every once in a while."

The corners of Taehyung's lips tugged upwards. "Wow, coming from you—"

"—I'm trying to be a good friend."