Silent Love, Silent Pain [Levi x OC]

15. Behind the wall

Sophie slept peacefully that night, her head was full of images of Furlan - his beautiful smile, perfect body, his sweet sounds. She was thinking about the way he held her in his arms after their first time together. How he was breathing steadily into her neck and rubbing her palms with his thumbs. For the first time she wasn't thinking about the filthy hands of other men on her body. It was all about Furlan now. That's why she was well-rested in the morning, something she really needed for the expedition.

She woke up Isabel and urged her to get up from bed to which she listened, but she complained during the whole breakfast time in the canteen. "I swear it's a crime, Soph!" she cried out when they were finishing their meal. "You can't stop one's dreams"

"Oi, if she didn't wake your ass I would come and do that myself" Levi said. He grabbed his plate and stood up to get them to clean. "I'll be waiting for you in the stables" he added before leaving.

"Yeah, see you later" Furlan said, but was more interested in Sophie than his friend. Another reason why Levi wanted to leave this little gathering. The further he is from them the safer they all are. At least that's what he had thought.

It didn't take them long to join him. He was already in his belts, with ODM equipment, scabbard and blades on. He was prepared for whatever was waiting for him outside those walls that he never saw before. "How are you feeling?" he heard Erwin behind his back, which caused him to turn to face him.

"How should I feel?" Levi shrugged his arms and crossed them on his chest which caused Erwin to slightly smile. He understood his message - he wasn't in the mood to chat with him. "I'll finally see what this fuss is all about. That's all"

"Good luck to you" Erwin replied, knowing that further attempts at conversation doesn't make sense at this point, not yet. He went to his horse and mounted him. He wanted to spend those last few minutes of safety in his saddle, observing how other Scouts were preparing themselves. Of course his eyes were more focused on Furlan, Sophie, Isabel and Levi these days. It was their first mission. Additionally, they joined his unit forcefully and never actually experienced life outside. He was wondering how this expedition will affect them and if it will change their attitude. If it will - he hoped that not because of traumatizing events like it was often to happen in their unit. He truly believed that wasn't the case this time. They did everything as they should have - they chose a day with good weather, a gate where there weren't a lot of titans and to top all of this they had a new formation that he worked on himself. It will be different this time and it will save Survey Corps from closing for good.

While Erwin was deep in his thoughts, Sophie was finishing to clasp her belts and was on her way to help Isabel with her own. "You're moving too wildly" she explained when Isabel asked why she wasn't good at it. "Just stand still and I'll do it for you".

"Can you fucking finish already? I don't want us to be the last" Levi rolled his eyes, even though deep down he admired Sophie for making sure that Isabel had put the equipment correctly. She was taking good care of her and it was that one thing that he admired about her. It was also the thing that made it harder for him to fight off his feelings. As long as his attraction was based only on her exquisite sounds, he could live with that. Live with guilt and disgust towards himself, but safe from thinking about her otherwise than just a comrade. Her caring nature was making things harder for him, since it was one thing that he truly liked in her. All the rest of her character he found shitty. That one crack on her image was making him worried that the picture of her that he built in his head will fall down. He couldn't afford that.

"Ugh, can you stop complaining for a moment?" she rolled her eyes as well and finished clasping Isabel's belts. "See? I'm already done" she looked at him, but he turned away.