Unloved (hanabi fanfic)

Chapter 2- hanabi

Hurt. She was hurt. So hurt in fact that her physical pain wasn't even a bother to her anymore. She just kept running. Running as far as she can. His words kept lingering in her mind.

"You're weak."
"She's better than you."
"You're not in our group anymore."

She didn't want to believe those were true. She wanted all this to be a bad dream.

She only stopped thinking about him when she felt something drip down her leg.
Blood. It was fresh blood.
Great. Her bandages must've fallen while she was running. But she didn't care. She did slow down when the aching pain stung her though.
She noticed she was now far away from the village. And in the woods. She took a few steps and recognised this as their old training area with haya. Great. Another thing to remind her of him.

She hissed and looked around to find the tree she liked to sit on. That tree was old and big. And it over viewed the village. So it was her favourite spot to rest and pull herself together.

She carefully climbed the tree. Making sure not the harm her wounds more. And sat comfortably at her spot. The view was just as beautiful as always. It made her forget all that has happened even for a slight second.

Unfortunately it didn't take long before her tears showed up again. She felt miserable, unworthy. She couldn't help but think maybe his words were true indeed, she was a burden to them most of the time. She always kept messing up and hayabusa had to help her up.

If nothing, she was the odd one of the group. She was the one that clinged onto hayabusa. Not kagura. She was the one that needed to leave them alone.

I mean, after all. She was weak.

She started crying even more. But she suddenly felt someone watching her. She quickly grabbed her hinganbana and turned around ready for attack. Only to find nobody behind her.

She put her hinganbana back to its place. And looked down. She saw the area where she and hayabusa would duel. It would always end up in a tie. With neither of them winning. This was one of the only times where both of them were alone.

She started remembering the beautiful memories they had, even as kids. They were quite the duo. Hayabusa was a shy kid. He would constantly be bullied and made fun of. That is before hanabi started protecting him ofcourse. She didn't know why though, why would she just randomly help a kid? Even before she knew they were bound to be married. She had no reason to. But she did. She started considering if that was even a good choice she made.

Yet she couldn't help but smile while thinking of all he has done for her. Helping her get better at duels. Saying it was a tie even though he won to make her feel better. He even gave her this bow for her to tie her hair so it wouldn't be a struggle to her while having a duel.
Even today he cared for her. Not because she was gonna be his wife. But because he truly cared for her

Was she being to fragile? If she didn't consider her feelings, he was quite right. She was always so distracted seeing them together, that she would end up in danger and hayabusa would have to save her evertime. And overtime she has become quite the struggle for both of them

"That's it. That's why he said all of those. He knows I'm weak and so do I. But the only thing he doesn't know, is that I'm weak for him..and him only."

She thought. She slowly got up and climbed higher up the tree. Then she got to the very top and looked up at the sky.

A gentle wind blew her hair. And as if it was a sign. She knew what she had to do to get better. All these years she knew. She just couldn't bring herself to do it. But this was the last straw. This was the moment she had to make the decision she was avoiding for so long.

She thought about everything. And then very slowly brought her hand up to her bow that was gifted to her by hayabusa. She untied the bow from her ponytail and held it up

She took one final look at it before kissing it. As if she was letting go of everything about him. Then. She held the bow high up. Letting the wind blow it away from her hands. She felt it being carried by the wind but didn't look back. Instead she grabbed her hinganbana and jumped down.

She landed on her feet while still looking down. Then slowly lifted her gaze up. This was it. She has let go of him. She isn't going to try anymore.

She was going to ask the master to match her with a new group. A group that hopefully wouldn't distract her.

She started walking back to the village before she stopped in her tracks.

Their wedding. Was in 2 weeks. She didn't want to marry him anymore. but she couldn't say no. It was for her clan.

She thought for a second but kept walking with her chin up. Yes. She was going to marry him. But for the sake of her clan only. No actual feelings. And she's gonna keep it formal. No feelings shown. No feelings hurt.

She didn't look back and started walking towards her masters house. Wiping away her tears. And now the only thing she wants is power.