Surfer Girl 2 // A.I (completed)

thirty-five

< January >
< Saturday >

{ Tatum }

I felt Ashton getting out of bed which is what woke me up. I slowly peeked my eyes open and watched him pull a shirt over his head. He stretched out with his back still to me, then turned around and saw I was awake,

"Go back to sleep Tatum. It's still early" he sighed and grabbed his phone and left our room. I furrowed my eyes. The past couple of days he's been an asshole. He's been in a mood and it's getting on my nerves. He's ignored everyone, even the kids, and goes off and isolates himself by working to get the garage turned into a studio. And just now, he called me by my name. He never uses my name anymore. It's always 'baby' or 'babe'. We haven't gotten in a fight or anything so I know it's not that.

I groaned and rolled onto my back. I was awake and there was no chance of me going back to sleep now. I got out of bed and stretched out my leg. I don't have to wear the brace anymore but I do still need to be careful.

As I walked out of the room and entered the kitchen, I saw my toddlers trying to get themselves a bowl of cereal. At first, I wasn't going to intervene and let them figure it out, but once Avery climbed on the counter and almost fell off, I interfered,

"Do you want some help?" I asked,

"Yes pwease" Krew nodded. I laughed and grabbed them both bowls and grabbed the cereals they like. Avery always eats Lucky Charms and Krew always eats Fruit Loops. I got them both bowls together and got their sippy cups filled then let them eat at the table,

"Does Daddy know you two are up?" I asked, finding it hard that Ashton didn't even get them settled or anything,

"Yeah, but he gwumpy" Avery told me. I sighed, but didn't continue,

"In a little bit you guys are going to Uncle Mike's to play with Noah," I told them, both sets of little eyes lighting up, "So eat up then I'll take you"

****

Once I had changed and gotten the kids dressed with little backpacks for the day, I got them in the car and texted Ashton, telling him where I was going, but he didn't respond. I'm definitely talking to him when I get home because this behavior is so unusual for him.

I pulled into Michael and Crystal's driveway and helped the kids out and led them inside. They ran off with Noah right away and Crystal hugged me,

"Thanks for having them over" I smiled,

"Of course. Noah has been begging for them to come over"

I quickly said my goodbyes and headed home.

****

I headed out back to the back garage that I knew Ashton was in. I peeked in the window to see if I could spot him. He was just sitting there on the couch he had put in there and was staring at nothing. I sighed but slowly opened the door, watching his head whip around to see me,

"Hey babe" I softly smiled. Ashton just sent a nod and went back to staring at nothing.

I walked closer and sat next to him, grabbing his hand to stop him from picking at his fingernails,

"What's going on Ash?" I asked,

"I'm fine" he muttered, but never ripped his hand from mine,

"No, you're not. You've been distant lately. You've been snappy. And you ignored Krew and Avery. So tell me what's going on" I spoke. I watched him just stare forward,

"Did I do something?" I asked. That made his head spin to me,

"What? No. Of course not" he assured,

"Then what's going on?" I asked once more. Ashton's lip started to tremble and his eyes welled up. I then watched him choke out a sob which made me hug him. His face buried into my shoulder and his body shook.

I stayed in the same spot, letting him calm down. I've rarely seen Ashton cry. I think I've seen him cry maybe three times. So whatever he's got going on must be hard for him.

I let one of my hands move up to his hair and I ran my fingers through. Soon he pulled back and leaned against the back of the couch, his fingers going to pick at his skin again. I quickly took his hand and he sighed,

"My dad called me" he spoke soft, making my eyes widen. He hasn't seen or spoken to his dad in twenty-seven years.

"He- he asked for money. I told him no. Then he went on some rant about how no matter how hard I try I'll turn out like him- a deadbeat dad and husband. I don't want to be that, but he's probably right. No matter how much I love you and the kids, I'll fuck up and ruin it all. I always do"

My heart ached,

"Babe, you won't be like your dad. And you may think you'll mess up, and you may, but that won't be enough for me to take the kids and go or for you to leave. You're the best dad I have ever seen. Krew and Avery admire you. And you're a pretty damn good husband. Don't listen to him Ash, he's just trying to hurt you"

"Well, it's working. He is still hurting me and it's been twenty-seven years since he left" he scoffed,

"Did he say anything else?" I asked,

"Asked me to bring you and the kids around. I told him absolutely not then he said he'd find us and see the kids himself. I told him if he went near the kids or you, I'd kill him"

"He's just trying to scare you. He won't come. Plus, he doesn't even know where we live" I told him, rubbing his thigh knowing it soothes him,

"Is there anything else bothering you? You were really upset and I know it's not just your dad" I pressed one final time,

"I don't want to be in the band anymore" he blurted. I think he was expecting me to be shocked, but I wasn't. I could tell that he was done. He wasn't enjoying it anymore,

"What do you want to do if not the band?" I asked,

"I just want to write for people and maybe produce. I don't know how to tell the boys" he spoke and pulled his hand from mine and let his head fall into them, "They're going to hate me"

"They won't hate you babe. If you just explain to them, they'll understand" I sighed and rubbed his back, "And you never know, maybe they are done with the band thing too"

It was my genuine thought. You can see it in their faces, all of them, that they aren't enjoying it anymore. I mean, three of them have families, and Calum's ready to settle down. They don't want to be gone all the time,

"Yeah" he sighed, "I just need to talk to them"

I nodded and he looked at me, hugging me to him,

"I'm sorry I was an ass" he kissed my head,

"It's okay" I nodded, "Talk to me next time. Don't keep it all bottled up"

"I promise"