Sabır (Patience) - Kurulus Osman

Chapter 55

Ceyda sat in her tent, her hand holding her head, a tear sliding down her cheek as more memories of Zohre Hatun flooded her mind, and with it, every cruel word she ever uttered to her dear aunt. Ceyda was up all night remembering. She remembered and hated and felt helpless and useless. Guilt was like a steel knife stabbing her gut. If this was the pain she was going through now, she could never imagine Aygul's position. She let out a shaky breath as she prepared for the funeral and to comfort her cousin.

Ceyda changed out of her dress to her regular tunic and trousers; she was in no mood to further celebrate, and she knew much of the tribe would think the same. After washing her face and hands, she headed toward Dundar Bey's marquee to see her aunt for the last time. It was still dark outside, but peaks of the sun's rays in the horizon signalled daybreak.

How gravely Ceyda was wrong when she saw a cart in front of the marquee where a shrouded figure lay still. Furrowing her brow in confusion, she noticed Dundar Bey, Hazal Hatun, and her son Bahadir standing behind the court, wearing remorseful yet disgusted expressions.

She slowly made her way beside them, in time to hear Dundar's order, "She shall be buried beside the castle she so often visited."

Shocked, Ceyda jerked her head to her uncle. "Is-is that my mother?" she stuttered. Dundar sighed lightly but did not look at her.

"She is a traitor, Ceyda, it's time you realize that," Hazal advised, angering Ceyda even more.

She ignored her and continued pressuring Dundar. "Why are we not having a proper funeral? Is this befitting for a Kayi Hatun-"

"Don't...don't devalue a Kayi woman by referring to your aunt," Dundar scolded. "She tried to poison the tribe...she tried to kill everyone because of her blind fury...she deserves this."

Tears pricked Ceyda's eyes. "But is it befitting for a Kayi Bey to bury a human like this? Is it in our Tore?" she asked quietly, earning a glare from Hazal Hatun. "Remember our laws, Emmi."

"Who are you to advise a Kayi Bey?" Hazal Hatun barged in. "Stay in your lines, Ceyda-"

"Hazal, stay out of it," Dundar snapped. "Go back to the tent with Bahadir." Once they started leaving, Dundar warned, "Ceyda...enough. What do you want me to do, ha? Do you want me to lovingly bury the tribe's traitor? What example does that set to others?"

Ceyda clenched her fist until her knuckles turned white. She tried to forget it, but now, the only thing she could see was Dundar sitting silently as he watched the murder of his wife. She saw Hazal smirking at the steps of the marquee, clearly trying to eavesdrop, and shook her head.

"I don't know...but I do know that you should perform your last duty to your wife respectively. This..." She gestured to the cart. "This isn't right, Emmi. It isn't right." And she stormed away.

Ceyda stopped at the short bridge between Erugrul Ghazi's marquee and Dundar's. She squeezed her eyes and slammed her fist on the railing. Ah Hazal Hatun...once I chop off that evil tongue of yours...those murderous hands...that stupid face... She stared ahead at the entrance of the tribe to see the cart leave, and with it, the dead woman she considered a mother despite their quarrels.

Her vision blurred with tears. "Don't go," she pointlessly whispered.

"I'm right here."

Ceyda blinked, then slowly turned to the auburn-haired, sky-blue-eyed Alp that made his way beside her. He rested his arms on the railing and watched the cart with her until it was out of sight.

Ceyda inhaled sharply and quickly wiped a tear away.

"I'm sorry for your loss...I know she was a mother to you, and... she shouldn't have died this way." He noticed Ceyda holding in her emotions by forcing a straight face, sniffing and rubbing her cheek every so often to prevent herself from crying. "It's okay to be sad," he said softly, starting for her hand but deeming it inappropriate and balling it instead.