Fourty

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Italy white
Miami FL📍

**

"On cripppp!" Dula yelled as I sat at a table.

We were at my baby shower and I was having the time of my life as of right now, the last time I went
to the doctor she said I miscarry but I knew it was too late they ended up running more test and the doctor ended up having to go on a suspension for Mis-information.

"My nigga ready to be dad I'm shocked.."Spider spoke. "Been ready" Dula shrugged chuckling..

You could tell dula was gone be the best dad he showed it every day, I was extremely proud of him how he stepped up and stopped the drugs and other stuff.

I was happy we weren't toxic anymore we were making stuff work.

"Wassup li one" nardo nodded at me putting gifts on the table. "Hey brother" I smiled giving him a side hug.

Even though him & angel were broken up he'd still call and check on me from to time which I was very grateful about.

"Fuck all that when we can go to y'all apartment?" Black questioned . "Never no negative vibes" I shrugged .

Dula & I ended up getting an apartment together last month, it was in Jacksonville everything in there was so nice we had Chloe's room set up and more.

I was beyond ready for my child to be in my arms, she made me mature so much and do shit I wasn't even thinking about doing.

I even ended up graduating early .

"Look I'm proud of you know that I'm ready for our child to be here man" Dula spoke wrapping his arms around me making me smile.

"And I'm proud of you too" I responded kissing his lips.

"Baby! Italy come here ! You look so pretty girl!" I heard Beverly voice making me chuckle before standing up heading towards her with dula right behind me.

Between my family & his family it was definitely packed out, I loved it everything about this day was going wonderful.

"Hey baby" she smiled hugging me tightly, I appreciated her so much she definitely pushed me in the right direction and I loved her for that.

"Hey mama" I smiled . "So fuck me?" Dula questioned.

"Damn right" she spoke making me laugh. "Italy!"
I heard making me look over to see Angel making me smile .

Last time I seen her or spoke to her was last month, she was acting crazy and out of control but she looked better now..

I ended up not talking to her because I didn't need that around me while I was doing better I definitely missed her though some people just need to figure themselves out like I did.

"Hey" I smiled. "Hey baby... I got you some gifts and more" she smiled hugging me.

Grabbing the bags handing them to dula I gave her a hug. "I missed you... are you okay?" I questioned ,

"I'm.. better I've been talking to a therapist and stuff so I'm getting there I'm really trying" She responded making me smile.

I'm very proud of her.

"That's good I'm happy for you.. why I don't see no belly on you?" I questioned making her shrug. "...got an abortion" she admitted making me nod.

I felt like that was the best option for her honestly she was struggling deeply with self love and Thinking she needed someone to love her she needed to figure that out before anything.

"That's good to be honest that was the best decision" I shrugged .

**

Angel white
Jacksonville FL📍

**

"Angel.. come here" I heard making me look over at nardo who was sitting at a table, sighing I walked over towards him.

We haven't spoke since the break up and that's honestly probably my fault I blocked him on everything so I could heal..

I felt like him reaching out wasn't going to allow me to heal due to the fact I thought I needed his love just so I could love myself.

Now I know my wrongs & know my weakness and I loved it I was doing very well as of right now I was proud of myself .

"Yes?" I questioned as he looked at me up and down. "You been okay?" He questioned making me nod.

He looked stress free & care free.

"You been on the gram living it up I love that for yo ass... you look happier I like that what you been up to?" He asked.

"Nothing honestly I've just been seeing a therapist getting help and trying to heal.. I admit you was right about the mama and daddy issues but i feel like I got it under control" I responded .

"That's good I'm proud of you on some real shit that's all I wanted you to do was heal from yo past trauma and shit I'm glad you did it" He nodded.

Honestly I appreciated him to the fullest for telling me my wrongs and telling me the honest truth some people wouldn't of done that.

"I thank you for that" I responded . "Just helping you know i love you don't want nothing but the best for you man... you not pregnant anymore?" He questioned staring at my stomach.

"No.. honestly it was best if I got an abortion I needed to figure out myself and how to love myself before bringing a baby into this world" I shrugged honestly.

"I feel you type shit I'm proud of you... you know I'm here for you whenever You need me when it's time for us to get back together we gone work on that but we friends for now" He spoke .

I nodded my head in agreement, I wasn't ready for a relationship again the way my mind set up is crazy I shouldn't do stuff like that just because I'm so called inlove .

"Thank you.. I love you on bad or good terms" I spoke making him smile. "And I love you too regardless the situation" He spoke standing up giving me a hug.

I stood up hugging him back tightly.

"Now unblock my number so I can check up on you from time to time" he told me making me chuckle taking out my phone.

"Damn yo hair so nappy man" I spoke running my hands through it making my fingers get stuck . "Man you played" He spoke getting my fingers out his hair making me laugh.

"MAMA MYA IS BACK THE FUCK OUTSIDEEE!" I heard Myra yell making me look over to see Mya bent over twerking, laughing I walked over to them with nardo right beside me.

"Gooo!" I hyped.

She had been put up for a while focusing on the baby but we'd always make sure to stop by to see how she was so it nice seeing her out.

No she didn't expose him you guys.

Anyways I'm done with this TRASH ass book.

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