Unspoken whispers

Listen- XXXIX

"Im, Im, Im sorry-"

"Dont be, its not your fault."

In his arms a fatigue washed over your head, as if the time you had spent in the frozen bubble had been catching up. Camilo eventually pulls away and you do so reluctantly, but as he sits he gestures for you to lay on his lap.

It held an air of delicacy. The familiar touch of his hands across your waist, the feel of his warmth and safety. The way his hair brushed against your face and how his lips brushed teasingly on the nape of your neck. It was an image you had ingrained in your memory by now, with how often it occurred.

"Camilo, Camilo i need to, need to tell you, tell you something."

He weakly smiles, searching around your face before his demeanor crumbled. The male sighed heavily, shoulders sagging. You lean your forehead against his chest, the repetitive beat of his heart calms you.

"Its nothing good is it?"

you shake your head. Camilo tenses, before speaking again. It was slight, but ever since Diego had come and gone his words were a hushed whisper that was accompanied by a feint tremor. To be fair he too scared you. But you can't imagine how scared he must've been to get hurt; how scared he must've been to lose you.

"Are you sure he didn't do anything, y/n?" Camilo pressed lightly, locking you with a serious gaze. You shake your head with a small smile.

"No, no, so dont, dont worry."

"Mi amor," He intensely studied your expression for a moment before a groan left his lips. "I worry too much, dont i?"

"You, you dont."

"But i do!"

A small laugh breaks out from the two of you, the sound a welcoming break from the terrible news you often seemed to be graced with. The rough pads of his fingers tracing circles into your palm. There were lines on his forehead as he smiled, eyes attempting to bring a comfort words could never amount to. The walls seemed to mimic his sweet actions, colours of warmth spreading, a fire place seated snugly in the middle of the room. Big, fluffy pillows were strewn about.

"Might as well be comfortable, right, amor?" Camilo proudly chuckled at your reaction. It illuminated him in a golden light.

He tightened his hold on you, and in protest you wiggle in his lap. It was then that you realized. The warmth, the comfort, the safety you felt with Camilo was all you've been searcing for. He completed you in ways you didnt even know was possible.

His breaths fanned your ear, making your stomach flutter.

"Well? Go on," You swore he did it on purpose, you couldn't even miss the obvious tease in his voice. "Im waiting Hermosa."

"i-" your throat tightens, and sinking fear drips into your stomach. Theres an uneasiness that had come with your realization that you could die, and bring the madrigals with you. "i think- i think i- i have to leave."

Out came your choked verdict, shocking both you and Camilo. He turns you around to meet your scared eyes, face softening as he felt the seriousness of the situation. The male sighs, gently stroking your hair as he held your quivering figure.

"y/n, i dont understand why-"

"people are, people, people are, trying,   going to go, to go after, after me and if i stay-" your voice hitches, Camilo rubbing small circles into your back. "if i stay, I'll- all of, all of you- you'll all, you'll all, be in danger."

"we'll protect you-"

"Camilo- theyre- theyre dangerous- and i- i- its all so- all so much-"

everything seemed to hit you now that you were with him. That feeling of vulnerability, the anxiousness of being unsure of who you truly were, the fear of departing from this world. But what made you heart ache further was the thought of leaving Camilo. It was terrifying, making your body tense up, and you grab onto the male suddenly, as if afraid he would leave then and there.

You didn't notice the tears before he had started kissing them away softly, his grip on you firm, as if giving a constant reminder that he was still with you. Little whispers of affection wafted in the air, washing away the overwhelming thoughts that clouded your mind.

His face was filled as well with what looked to be a panic. Despite his sure and comforting actions, you could see how his brows scrunched together, lips pursed as he did what he could. And that was enough. With him bombarding you kisses and confessions of love, how on earth could you keep yourself from that feeling of small bliss?

"Mi amor- hey," Camilo places his hand onto your cheek, smiling warmly at you. His fingers intertwines with yours, drowning you in a welcome solace."dont cry... We'll figure this out together okay?"

Oh how the turn tables. When before it was you who dried his tears, it is now him who strokes your hair and assures you that you were going to be okay. eventually your sobs turned into sniffles, and he toyed with your hair, gently moving to hold you better. His voice is tentative and gentle, hands wrapping around yours as he hums.

"good girl, there we go." you nestled deeper into his embrace, hiding yourself in his rauna. The male sighed, looking down at you with a soft expression.

"now... I need to know what happened while you were gone. Can you tell me, hermosa?"

For awhile you hesitate, before drawing in a breath. You're silent for awhile, and Camilo nuzzles into your neck, gently rubbing circles into your hands.

"take your time, amor." he paused, eyes going soft as he examined your hands. He scanned over every crevice, every finger, smiling softly. " i love you, you know. A lot. I know its too early, but the way i feel for you, i haven't felt it for anyone else."

His words were like silk and honey to your ears; rich, deep, smooth and sweet. Roses bloomed onto your cheeks as you blushed and Camilo chuckled endearingly. The smell of roasted firewood wafted around the room, engulfing you. Sleep was tugging impatiently at your eyelids and you couldn't fight back the yawn that escaped your lips. Your boyfriend followed suit, mimicking your yawn and leaning his head against yours. 

"Camilo, I, I'm tired...'

"but," he protested sleepily. "mi corazon, this is important, you should tell me-"

You sloppily cut him off with a kiss, and he pulls you closer, deepening it. Everything seems to be in a whirl as your legs remained intertwined with his. The kiss is desperate, both of you searching for answers in the other. You bring your hand up to tug against his hair and he groans lightly, pulling back only to press his lips needily against you once more. Your body was hot, the room was hot, you don't remember when the fireplace and the pillows turned into a dimly lit bedroom. You reach for Camilo, aching to pull him closer, begging for just a little bit more.

"Mi amor-" Camilo was panting, sweat dripping from his brow. "Mi amor, we can't-"

"please," You cant believe how needy you sound. You stare up at him, fluttering your eyelashes, whining softly. "please, please-"

"y/n." 

Camilo cant bare to meet your gaze. He sternly shakes his head. gently pulling away from you. You feel a blizzard of emotions: hurt, pain and... relief?

"I'm not going to take advantage of you like that."

"but- but, but, you're not, i, i, i want it too-"

"Carino, you don't understand," his voice is soft now, hand reaching out to rub against your cheek. "You're distraught, you're confused. I want to help you, Hermosa, but you need to tell me what's happening."

"Camilo..." Now its you who avoids his expectant gaze, the once lost feeling of fear finding its way back into your stomach. IT makes you feel sick, words you're still meaning to say churning. 

"al, alright, fine."