Shadowhunters: One Shots

There Are Worst Things I Could Do

Shadow hunters do Grease Part 4

Alexander Gideon Lightwood was sick. Or at least he thinks that he is sick. He couldn't sleep, or eat and he doesn't know why.

Rehearsals had gone by a few weeks and Alec was sat watching Magnus perform 'Sandra Dee' with Izzy and the rest of 'The Pink Ladies' Magnus was wearing a Red wig that matched Clary's hair and was mocking Clary's character Sandy as he sang and danced moving his hips rather drastically like Elvis, all over the prop bed that they were using. Alec gulped as Magnus winked during the line "As for you Troy Donahue, I know what you want to do." It was as if Magnus was winking at Alec in particular and the feeling of hot, sweaty and bothersome had over come Alec, he felt as if he couldn't breathe, he pinched his two fingers at his shirt collar so he could get some air but even that wasn't working.

Jace who was sat by Alec noticed that something was wrong with his brother he placed a hand onto his shoulder "Alec, Are you alright?" He asked looking concerned. Alec was breathing rather heavily and shakingly with his face all gone red , he shook his head "I-I can't breathe,"he gasped out, everything seemed to of gone into slow motion and Magnus's figure had become a blur, the walls seemed to of started to close in on him and he couldn't hear Jace's response from the ringing that was in his ears, it was as if Alec was under water.

Alec stood up erruptingly from his seat "I-I can't do this,"he breathed out "I-I just can't!" And he ran out of the auditorium feeling tears stream down his face as his face hits the cool fresh outside air, once outside Alec threw off his jacket and could feel his throat naturally start to open up again, and his breathing was starting to go back to normal. With relief Alec had his eyes shut and was taking calm, rhythmiatic breaths feeling the cool breeze hit his skin and through his hair, 'that's better,' he thought 'A lot better.'

Alec opened his eyes hearing running footsteps from behind, he turned and was greeted by Jace and Isabelle who both looked worried and concerend for their brother. "Alec are you alright!?" Izzy asked frantically, Alec nodded running his fingers through his hair "Um yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine." But Alec knew that he wasn't fine, he knew that he wasn't going to be fine for you see, Alec is hiding a deep dark secret from the people that he loved and from himself as he didn't want to admit it, and this secret could change his life forever and Alec didn't want things to change. Jace gave Alec a brotherly nudge from the shoulder that Alec knew was to break the ice and out of relief as Jace had his teasingly mannered smile back on his face, "You had us worried there buddy,"he said. Alec let's out a chuckle but it wasn't very genuine if anything it was forced along with his smile "Yeah, nothing to worry about here." 'But they should be worried,' he thought, because Alec knew that nothing was going to be the same again.

***

All the way home Alec was quiet and staring out of the passenger window of Jace's car, zoning out into his own little world with that denomic haunting voice that was coming from his mind as if it was from a horror movie, 'Tell them!' It was saying all raspy and spine chilling that it made Alec shiver a little with just the thought of it 'Telll them!' But how could Alec tell his family that he loved to pieces, more than anything in this world,that he would go into the pits of burning hell and die for that he is Gay?

It was even worse over Family Dinner that evening. Alec's Mother Maryse had made Alec's favourite home cooked meal, that the Lightwoods had called 'Maryse Lightwoods world famous Lasange!' And it was as good as what the tittle says even better in fact, normally Alec would devoure every bite of the pasta dish as Alec loved and lived for Pasta but tonight he didn't touch it, he was just playing around with his food mushing it up with his fork.

"Alec what's wrong?" Maryse asked, the Lightwoods were sat around the Family dinning room,"You've hardly touched your Pasta."
Izzy and Jace look at eachother sharing a look of worry and concern, ever since today's rehearsal and outburst Alec had been acting all different and weird and they didn't like it. "I'll have it if you don't want it!" Alec's youngest brother Max who is 5 years old and had his mouthful of garlic bread, he had already finished his plate of food. "Max no speaking with your mouthful," Alec's Father Robert said wiping his mouth with a paper napkin, Maryse had her eyes focused on Alec, "Are you sick?" she reaches over to place her hand on her sons forehead to check his temperature but Alec dodged and moved back slightly, "No Mom I'm not sick," he said, "Then what is it?" his mother asked, "You love my Lasagne."
"I'm just not hungry," Alec shrugged not seeing the big deal out of it.
Maryse looked at Alec carefully and nodded to herself, "Somethings wrong," she said "I know my boy and something is troubling you."