[3] ORDINARY

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ORDINARY

"You're up early

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"You're up early." Bucky says when he sees me enter the gym.

"Yeah. I wanted to get some training done."

"You've been training a lot."

"It helps me clear my head." I say, shrugging my shoulders slightly as I wrap the bandages around my hands.

Positioning myself in front of the punching bag next to him, I begin my training. Bucky doesn't say anything else, resuming his training as well.

At first, the punches are strong, but as I keep going, they start getting weaker and weaker, my hands slowly dropping to my sides as tears blur my vision, my breathing quickening as my heart rate picks up.

I was so focused on putting most of my strength into my punches, that I didn't notice that I punched wrong, my hand throbbing from the impact.

Ignoring it, I move on to my kicks. Perhaps I should work on that today.

Exhaling, I get in position, and kick with all my might, grunting every time my leg comes in contact with the sack.

Tears well up in my eyes as I look at the sack.

I've made some progress.

But it's not enough.

Is this really the best I can do?

"You're over doing it." Bucky says, pulling the bag away from me.

"Wanna tell me what's going on?"

"What do you mean?"

When he gives me a look, I add,

"I'm fine."

"Talk to me doll." He says, in a softer tone this time. "You always know when something is wrong and you're there to help. Let me do the same for you."

"I know the kind of mind tricks Hydra uses. I can understand what's going on."

"It's not Hydra that's bothering me."

"Is it nightmares?"

I stay quiet.

Bucky lets out a soft sigh.

"Listen doll, it's okay to admit that you're having a hard time. There is nothing wrong with that. We all need a little help at times you know? If we didn't, I'd be worried."

"You don't have to pretend, doll." He adds. "Not with me."

"Now, want to tell me why you are training like there is no tomorrow when you clearly look exhausted?"

"Because I want to become stronger."

"Pushing yourself like this is not going to get you there."

"I know." I admit, pushing my fingertips into my scalp. "I just want to prepared."

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