TW: death, symptoms of depression
Floris closed the door behind him and Lucy. She just let out a long sigh, sitting down on the nearby couch. "I miss him already.", she buried her face in her hands.
She wasn't crying, she couldn't anymore. She didn't even feel the sadness. Lucy felt empty.
Floris got himself a chair, he had gotten rid of the jacket he was wearing, only leaving him in his black pants and a white shirt.
He placed the chair in front of Lucy, sitting down, leaning forward to her.
He placed his index finger under her chin and softly lifted her face up at him. "It's okay, Luce. Your father just died you are allowed to be sad."
As much as she was enjoying the sparks Floris' action had left on her skin and in her stomach, she turned away. "That is the problem, I would like to be sad, but I just feel empty. I feel like it's my fault. I feel like I am always fucking everything up. I was confident when I realised I liked you, and oh boy I would have made a move earlier if I didn't feel like I fucked everything up with 'that night' or literally any minor mistake! I feel empty and still I am angry at myself for things that if I say them out loud sound like I am trying to create problems!", she ranted, getting rid of her shoes and crossing her legs on the couch.
Floris took one of her hands and started to trace the lines on it, somehow calming Lucy immediatly. His goal was simply to make her forget what she had just said and what she had talked about... 'that night' was an open wound to both.
"You know what my mother said when I was sixteen and my all time favourite cat from our neighbours had died? I know it's not comparable, but I think the answer would help you.", Floris was only looking at her hand, messaging it further.
Lucy sighed, trying to calm herself even more. "What did she say?"
" 'The sadness, some describe it as emptiness, you're feeling is grief. It is you being angry for the things you could have done, but in the end grief is just love that doesn't know where to go, because you didn't show it while you could.' "
Lucy thought about it for a long time. She just looked at Floris still tracing the lines on her hand, feeling the way it tickles on her skin and unpacking what he had said.
They stayed like this for a while. Floris messaging Lucy's hand and Lucy deep in thought. It felt like an eternity of silence, but a comfortable one.
"Your mother is a wise woman, I'd love to meet her sometime.", Lucy said, still looking like she was zoning out.
"Actually, that's another point I wanted to talk about...", Floris looked at her, she snapped out of her trance, looking back at him, "you said to your dad, you would move out, but don't know where... I just wanted to let you know that you'd be welcome in my childhood home. In the Netherlands. I still live with my parents, you could take the guest's room."
Lucy smiled at him, "Already moving in together, I see, you sly fox", both realising the unintentional joke she had made and of course, laughing loudly.
"I'm gonna be honest, Floris... I don't have much of a better choice, do I?", she smiled.
He smiled back. "You can just try if living with my parents and Boots is comfortable for you and if it isn't, you could move somewhere else and might even take me with you.", his smile turned into a smirk.
"Alright, casanova", Lucy yawned, showing clearly they had talked for long enough and should go to bed.
Floris stood up, holding out a hand for her to grab. "I don't wanna walk", Lucy pouted.
"Well, I can only try carrying you, because I am just a...", he stopped, gesturing towards his small figure, trying to find a word. Lucy was faster. "Because you're just a lanky coder boy", she laughed, which made them both remember the night at the Brighton beach.
Floris opened his mouth playing like this insult hurt him. She laughed at him. "Alrigghhttt I will walk myself.", she got up, only getting her pj's and changing in the bathroom.
Floris changed in the bedroom, already laying down, as Lucy knocked. "Come herreeeee!", he whined, opening his arms like a little kid who was asking for a hug.
Lucy smiled at his childish acting. "Only because it's you"
She laid down in the queen sized bed, next to Floris. The moment she had settled, he snaked his arms around her waist and pulled her closer to him.
They were both laying on their sides, facing eachother, if it wasn't for the height difference. He held her back with one arm, the other was replacing Lucy's pillow. She had both her arms around his waist, cuddling closer.
Floris chuckled at her and kissed her hair, before whispering "Good Night", but not getting an answer. Lucy was already asleep.
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The Furry and The Bird {fundy x oc}
Fanfiction"It's in the past and I can do is learn or forget.", she shrugged the topic off. As Lucy's dream of streaming isn't that much of a dream anymore, she makes friends and enjoys her life. But with Highs come Lows and she will have to face them. (englis...
