Cupid Stupidity (Love Material Series #1)

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

"Anak, kumain ka na ba?" Papa asked.

Kakarating ko lang galing sa school.
Sobrang nakakapagod ang araw na 'to dahil sobrang daming homework at business proposal na gagawin. Dito na tumira si Papa ngunit hindi kami nagpapansinan.

Hindi talaga siya umalis gaya nang sabi niya noon. He's making an effort for us to heal, but it's like he's invisible to me. I have no desire to engage with him. I'm not ready to open up, I'm not ready to talk to him. The wounds are still raw, too deep to even contemplate conversation.

Hinila niya ang isang upuan para roon ako umupo. "Shain, anak, dito ka na maupo. Ipagsasandok na rin kita, gusto mo?"

Hindi ako sumagot sa kaniya, nanatili ako natayo sa harapan nito.

"Halatang pagod na pagod ang anak ko, ah!" nakangiting tugon ni Papa.
Ramdam na ramdam ang paglalambing ni Papa sa akin.

Nagpapatay malisya na ako parang walang marinig. Napabuntong-hininga ako at tumingin sa diretsyon sa kaniya.

"Ikaw na lang mag-isa," malamig na sambit ko. "Kakain ako pagkatapos mong kumain,"

I stepped back into my room, knowing I had to pull an all-nighter to study. The week ahead was packed with assignments and reviews, with University Days looming just around the corner. It's the same old story in college—constant pressure, constant stress. Survival mode kicks in. Dropping my bags and folders, I flopped onto my bed and gazed up at the ceiling, feeling the weight of it all.

"How long will I stay stuck in this darkness, Shain? How long until I break free?" A thought suddenly crosses my mind.

"What's going on, Shainny? Why do you seem so troubled?"

Sometimes, I find myself asking these questions, even though I'm the one who's confused. I'm striving hard for myself. Eventually, people will wonder when I'll start standing up for myself.

"What steps should I take? What should I avoid to be better?" I ponder aloud.

Just then, I parted my lips  when someone offered me a handkerchief. I almost inquired about their sudden appearance and how they managed to enter my room, but they gesture towards my face instead and he pointed at my face.

“Bakit umiiyak ka, anak?" My Papa said with low monotone.

Napatayo ako at balak ko na sana kunin ang panyong nasa kamay nito ngunit bigla itong umupo sa tabi ko and he wiped my tears. I didn't even know I was crying.

"Ano'ng nangyari, bunso?" he asked. "Nandito lang si Papa,"

Umiling lang ako. "Wala 'to, Okay lang ako, Sanay na. . ."

Sinanay na ako nang mundo.

"Ilan years na ako lumalaban mag-isa kaya sanay na sanay na ang sarili ko sa ganiyan. . . kung kailan nasanay na ako sa sakit, doon pa lang ako hihingi ng tulong sa iba?" I smiled painfully.

Sa tuwing iniisip ko ang mga iyan, automatic ang luha ko ay magbabadya sila. Tumahimik siya, hinayaan ako magsalita nang magsalita.

"Naiintindihan kita, bunso," he gave me a painful smile. "Alam kong malakas at matapang ang bunso ko, kaya malalagpasan mo iyan. Dalaga ka na talaga, you're already a big girl! I miss my baby girl's kisses and hugs!"
His smile exudes such tranquility.

I've spent years searching for his laughter, his warmth, his mere presence. . . as my father.

"Ano, lalabas na ako, ah? Mukhang mag-aaral ka pa." biglang sambit niya.
Akmang aalis sana ito ngunit tinawag ko siya.