Limitless: The Second Edition

Oliver

The next Monday is Courtney's first rehearsal with us. We're all really excited. As soon as everyone found out she was a real live Broadway choreographer, she became an instant celebrity. I'm so excited for she and Hannah. They have now begun making up for over a decade of lost time and exchanged numbers at last. They are still inseparable after all these years. And if she replaces me with her, it'll be fine. She deserves to be happy. That's all I ever wanted for her.

Today we are taking a break from music. Today we are gathered on the stage, warming up to dance. While everyone else is doing stretches standing up, I'm sitting off to the side with Hannah and we're stretching sitting down. I am straight up flattered that she decided to warm up with me instead of with the others. And fortunately, Ms. Dawson is letting her do it. She's doing her best to create an inclusive environment for everyone here, including me.

As Hannah and I work on warm up stretches, we chat casually. "So, you ready to dance?" I ask her.

"Oh, definitely," she replies eagerly. "But I'm not too thrilled about sharing Courtney with all these people." She looks up from reaching forward to touch her toes and grins at me. "But you're an exception. You found her, so of course I'll share her with you."

I can feel myself blushing. "I'm flattered, Hannah."

"Don't mention it, Oliver. You earned it. I'm more than happy to share her with you. After all, you've had to hear me talk about her for the last few weeks."

When warm up time ends, we rejoin the group, ready for Courtney to lead us in the dance moves for "Winner". I'm a little nervous. No, I'm very nervous. I don't want Courtney to see me dance. Sure, Hannah thinks I'm a good dancer, but an actual Broadway choreographer is another thing. But the more I think about it, the more I realize something.

Nobody, including Hannah, Sadie, and David, has even mentioned or pointed out the fact that I can't walk normally since I met them. Not even Courtney has said anything. The only reason Hannah brought it up on Thursday is because I brought it up first. I'm the only one saying anything about my disability. It's like the others don't even notice my crutches. And as I look around, I realize that these people don't care whether I can walk or not. They're too focused on having a good time.

Courtney has everyone line up in a V-formation. I'm supposed to be at the center. After all, I am the star of this number, not to brag, of course. I still can't seem to fight off those ugly thoughts that Courtney will think less of me when she sees how little I can dance. I'm gripping my crutches so tightly my knuckles are white. I can't help it.

"Before we begin," I say quietly but loud enough to get Courtney's attention. "I can't do much. I don't want to make everyone else here look bad."

Courtney shakes her head. "I don't have many rules, Oliver, but my main rule is no talking bad about yourself. Remember, Derek would be proud of whatever you can do. Just focus on me and follow my lead."

The mention of Derek's name refills my confidence, and I fix my eyes on Courtney, ready to show her that I do want to dance. That's all I want, really. I just want to dance like Hannah. I want to leap through the air as flawlessly as she does. I attempt to do the upper body choreography that Courtney is demonstrating for me, but it's hard with my forearm crutches. My arms aren't exactly free.

"He's pretty good," I hear Hannah whisper from behind me. "I don't see why he thinks he's not."

"I'll say," Sadie replies. "He is pretty good."

I am of course completely honored by their compliments, but I decide to block them out to concentrate. However, it is becoming increasingly difficult to block out Hannah's voice. I can't make out what she's saying, but I hear the word "crutches" in there somewhere. It doesn't faze me, though. I trust her enough to know that whatever she's saying about my crutches, she's not being malicious. It's nice to be able to trust someone like that. I'm glad that I can trust people here. It's the first time I've been able to trust someone outside of my family circle like this, and it feels good.

Just. then, I feel someone tap me on the shoulder. The next thing I know, Ms. Dawson is right beside me, holding the crutches I'll be using in the show. I quickly put two and two together and figure out she's trying to make my job easier. And once I set mine aside and slip the new ones under my arms, I feel free. I can move my arms around.

I can dance.

After rehearsal, I'm feeling like I'm walking on air. I'm just about to get my crutches back when Hannah lays a hand on my arm. I turn to face her and she's staring at me with a determined look on her face.

"I want to dance," she says.

I stare back at her. "Well, you're the best dancer I've ever seen, so in my book, that gives you the right to bust out dancing whenever you feel like it."

She shakes her head. "No. That's not what I meant." She sets her phone on the nearby lectern where my crutches are and turns on "Winner". "Let's dance."

I'm about to protest, but then something inside me tells me to just go along with it. The prettiest girl in this entire cast wants to dance? Then I'm going to try my best to dance. I hesitantly set my crutches aside and grip onto her shoulders.

Okay, she's going to let me lean on her. Great. She's so tiny, though. I'm pretty muscular from hauling myself around on crutches for the majority of my life, but she just seems so delicate. I'm afraid to hurt her. But she isn't bothered. She's going to support me. She's adjusting herself to make sure I don't have to put weight on my bad leg as she leads me in a gentle slow dance.

Look, people are probably staring at us right now. But I really couldn't care less. I'm too overcome with blissful emotion right now to care. This feels good. I want this feeling to go on forever. And before I know it, we're three-quarters of the way across the stage. I look back over my shoulder, but Hannah reaches out and directs my attention back to her.

"Look how far we've danced," she whispers. "On your own, with me."

I suddenly wish I could tell her what I feel right now. Is it love? I honestly don't know. But what I do know is that I'm losing my balance right now. She's just so beautiful, though, and I don't want to admit that I need to stop. But I don't have a choice. "That felt amazing," I reply. "But I need to get my crutches back. I can't hold on much longer."

"Can you go backwards?" she asks.

I nod. "Yeah, I think so."

"Alright. Just hold onto me. I'll get you back there."

And she does. She leads me back to get my crutches. When I get them back over my arms, I can't help but feel a bit disappointed. I wish I could just discard them for good. I wish I could have that liberating feeling of dancing with Hannah for the rest of my life.

Courtney calls Hannah over, telling her she's going to take her to dinner. As Hannah leaves, she looks back over her shoulder at me.

"Thanks for the dance," I call to her.

She smiles warmly at me. "No problem. Anytime."

With that, she walks away, still constantly looking back at me every few seconds.

And my heart swells with emotion. I wish I could tell her.