Childish

56

The first time meeting Cooper went really well. He seemed calm and relaxed around me and didn't make me feel anxious at all. I knew Alex and Naomi were stressed out but they were parents of a tiny baby and it was new to them. I knew we were all waiting on him to get bigger.

I didn't realize how much until a couple of months in he developed colic. He cried all. The. Time.

It drove me nuts.

I tried not to let it show around Naomi and Alex because I knew it was stressful enough. I understood. But I was miserable and it made it hard for me to sleep.

I didn't truly realize how bad it was until I had a meltdown one morning going to school.

Alex walked into my room with dark bags under his eyes. His walk was slow, like he was forcing himself to move with each step he took. I made fun of him a lot but I felt for him.

He shook me awake before he pulled my blanket off me. "Lyla, it's time to get ready. I need you to wake up."

I rolled away from him and buried my face in my bear.

"Lyla, come on. Don't fight me on this."

He reached for my bear and I started waving my arms at him, slapping him wherever my hands came into contact.

"Lyla, that's enough." His voice was stern and sharp. He didn't usually talk to me like that.

I opened my eyes enough to glare at him. "Go away."

Rather than respond to me, he lifted me out of my crib and carried me to the changing table. My bear was left behind in the crib.

I whined and pushed against him. I tried leaning away from him but his grip on me was stronger than I was. He wasn't letting me go.

He set me down on the table and got close enough that I wouldn't fall off in my attempt to get away. "Lyla, I need to get you ready for school. Please, stop fighting me."

"My bear," I whined.

"If I get you your bear, will you stop?"

I nodded.

"Stay put."

I watched him walk back to my crib and grab my bear from inside. He carried him back over and handed him to me.

"Is that better?"

"Can I go back to bed?"

He rolled his eyes and reached for a clean diaper. "No, Lyla. You have school today."

I groaned. "But I'm tired."

"Maybe you can get an extra long nap in today. I'll mention it to Diane when we get there." The way he spoke in such a snarky way made me want to hit him.

I laid back and waited for him to be done changing me and getting me dressed in clean clothes. I knew I'd be able to sleep in the car on the way to school but I wasn't sure Ms. Diane would let me sleep when I got to school. But I knew I desperately needed to get some more sleep.

---

Ms. Diane handed me a bottle. "Why did Alex tell me you've been mean today?"

"I'm always like that. I like to pick on him. He's used to it."

"There's a difference between picking and being mean."

"Alex can handle it."

"Lyla, how would you feel if he was mean to you?"

I frowned. "That's different. I'm just a kid."

She looked down at me with a raised eyebrow. "That's not an excuse for being mean. You can't treat other people like that and not expect it in return."

I looked away, her gaze suddenly feeling very heavy. "I was just... cranky."

She rubbed my back in time with how she was rocking us in the rocking chair. "Tell me what happened. What's going on?"

"I'm just not getting enough sleep. When Alex woke me up this morning, I was still really tired."

"So you snapped at him?"

"I guess you could say that."

"You need to apologize to him. You don't want him being mad at you because of something you did."

I sighed. She was right. Of course, she was. She always knew the right way to handle things and fix problems. Maybe she was in the wrong profession just babysitting all day.

She reached behind her and grabbed the small blanket that had been draped over the back of the chair. She laid it over me and pulled it up enough that it was covering up to my chest. "So tell me why you haven't been getting enough sleep. You've been sleeping more this week than usual."

"It's Cooper. He's been crying nonstop lately. I can't sleep because he won't shut up."

"How close is his room to yours?"

"We share a wall. And it's like the thinnest wall you've ever seen. I hear everything and it keeps me up all night."

"Have you tried telling Alex this?"

"He's been cranky too. I can tell he isn't getting enough sleep at night. I don't wanna bug him over this when he already knows it's a problem."

"Maybe he doesn't know that it's affecting you."

"But I don't wanna make a big deal over it."

"Either you do it now when things aren't so bad or you wait until you get sick because you haven't gotten enough sleep."

I put the nipple of my bottle into my mouth as I mulled over my options. I knew I needed to talk to Alex. The problem with Cooper wasn't going to resolve itself. That much I knew. So if Alex and Naomi could help, I needed to give them the opportunity to do so.

"Do you think you could help me talk to him?"

She smiled like she'd gotten what she wanted. "Of course, sweetheart."