The Second Dragonoid's Tale

Chapter 35: Before The Dark Horizon

It was before the start of my first year in middle school, in the summer when my parents took me on a cross-country trip. It was fun in the beginning, seeing new places, tasting new foods, and taking pictures together. We were happy.

But as the days went on, I would find that I felt something was missing as I gazed up at the night sky. As it often was, there was no starry sky filling the black void of space. Only streetlights along the highway illuminated my eyes as we went by one after another. Once, while he was driving and noticed I was awake, did my father ask if everything was okay.

"I don't know," I replied, gaze fixed on what was outside the window.

"If you're homesick, I can understand," He said, trying to connect. "New things can take a lot out of you. Sometimes you're overwhelmed and want to cry, other times you just... If you ever do know what it is, I'll listen."

"Thanks," I said.

The rest of the drive was silent until mom woke up. When we returned home and the school year started, I never lost the missing feeling. Then, one night, on a whim, I stunk out of the house. Climbing out of my window with nothing except the clothes on my back, I walked to the nearest park. The night was cold and no one was there. The only sound came from the few cars passing by in the distance and the trees rustling from time to time.

I gazed up, sitting on one of the benches behind only the sky, and stared for a time at the moon, the brightest thing in the sky at the time. And as time continued on I believed, for a moment after many moments, I understood what was bothering me, but had yet to put the words together. The bittersweet truth, too strong for my tongue.

"There you are!" I heard my mother's voice as she ran over to me. "What are you doing here?" I found it hard to speak, my tears welling up from my throat. "What's wrong?"

She sat beside me, a soft and worried expression on her face as she took my hand. "I don't know... I feel," A trail of tears began to leave me. "I'm missing something, someone."

"Oh," She used part of her long sleeve to clean the tears, "Honey, you... You're just like your father."

"I don't..." I looked at her, her eyes understanding.

"Neither of you understand what that heart of yours feels," She pulled me into a hug. "Even when you don't know what it is, your heart does and it's trying to tell you."

"Dad's like this?"

"More than he wants to admit," She gently petted the back of my head. "Just know, it may not be today or tomorrow, but something life-changing is on the horizon when you feel it. He felt it before we first met, before we had you, and even now I know he's started to feel it again."

"I... hate this feeling," I held her tightly, "It's hollow and dark, and I can't feel anything else."

"I know, I felt something like it once when I lost someone dear to me..." She took a deep breath. "It will be okay, my little Ladon."

After that night, there would be more times when I would be overwhelmed and cry before something happened. And each time it did, my parents would console me each time. Then came the first time, when my tears fell, that no one was there. And now, in Tempest, I feel alone with my feelings. Without another who understands what it is I am feeling.

Though Erebus stays beside me, and I know some would hear me out, I find that I wish to say nothing of this feeling to them. They would only grow more concerned and understand me less. That is why, when morning came the next day, when Shion came to check on me, I told her that I was sorry, but I no longer thought it was a good idea for us to be together. Hurt by my words, Shion still tried to console me instead of accepting what I said.