I once was a Duchess

21

   " Why did she stop writing? Did she just grew tired?" Elijah asked
" The last date in her diary is, No."
"What is it!?" He asks while guiding the horses.
"The last date is the day of the massacre. The day right before it."
"How could a person from the outskirts know of that!? Only unless you are a noble who was there or a servant."
"Yes but why would a noble be at a ruffian bar? Full of bandits?"
"So what are you going to do Duchess?"

I went silent trying to make sense. And trying to only convince myself it was a coincidence.
But no noble goes to a ruffian bar let alone in the outskirts where it's known as the distant lands. Many nobles keep away from the places commoners are so what noble would?

Suddenly a large rock hits the wooden wheels. And the wheels pop the wagon up causing me to slightly pop up and fall back down. The horses began to gallop in sudden unsteadiness causing the even rockier roads to bump and bump the wagon.

" Woah there! Easy! Snow and night. Easy!" But the horses did not listen no matter how hard he pulled the reins. Until once again an even bigger bump appeared in the distance. " Elijah.. Elijah! Watch out!" I said holding on tightly to his cloak. All to have an unpleasant fall.
My eyes were closed shut afraid to break the fall since the wagon was quite high. But instead of a welcoming pile of dirt I was welcomed by the arms of someone else, Resting on my bottom was Elijah's hand.
" Are you alright?" Elijah asks me as I am sat on my stomach in his lap. His legs were so warm while his stomach felt as if I hit it my hand might break. I jolted up feeling his warm hand on my leg and bottom, surely getting up. I was fine until those eyes of his gazed into mine.
Time stood still as I hovered over his lap with my hands pressed against his legs. He stood still as his eyes were fixated on me
He then licks his lips as his sweet pink lips cup into a smirk.
I could feel something bounce in his trousers, As a bead of sweat dropped from his neck and a look of thirst and hungry lay on his face.
I've never seen him make a face like this before, just so...hungry. And I can't say I hated it.
" Want to stay on me forever?" My face flushed red and I pushed off of him sitting far on the wagon crossing my legs and sitting down turning my head the other way. He chuckles continuing to prep the horses to continue our journey.

"I'm sorry princess, you were gonna fall and the first thing I could grab onto-"
"Shush I want peace." I say cutting him off, and he listened not uttering a word but quietly snickering.

He was okay the whole ride. While I wasnt flushed in red once again and conflicted when I thought I had the Duke in my heart.
But slowly along the years came to know that maybe it wasn't love that I felt. But a sense of longing to be appreciated by someone.

Here Elijah is sitting beside me, Sarcastic and mean yet kind with a big heart. He's cold and likes to keep a distance between people ices over. Yet with me he is warm and slightly lowers that guard of his that's held ever so high.
Do I love Elijah?
Or do I love Ajun?
Was Ajun even the same man I could trust, He's yet to even try to look for me so what exactly happened to him?

I kept asking myself these questions confused. Until Elijah tells me a secret meant to be heard.
Yet to this moments I still don't know what my heart wants.
You or him. The one I'm destined to, Or the one that I desire.