The Wrong Love Affair

I Love you, Goodbye

When I woke up, I was disoriented. I cried the entire night and when I almost started to cry again when I saw myself in the mirror. Big dark eyebags, swollen eyes, red nose, and tons of acne breakouts. What am I doing? I left the safe haven that is Eric for a unsure and Chris. Karma's a bitch and is works really fast.

I stayed in my room for days, it is as if nothing mattered now. I did not expect this plot twist to this story. I thought he is different. Is it too late now to beg Eric back and tell him I made a mistake? I asked for several days of absence because I just can't do it anymore. Lara's been checking on me everyday, but I refused to see her. In fact tons of my people have been worrying and is trying to reach out to me but the pain is just unbearable. My phone then rang Chris' ringtone.

'Hello Saree, can we talk? Meet me on campus, at our usual spot at 5 pm. He hung up even before I could reply. Talk? Why would I want to talk to him? After what he did, I don't think I can and will talk to him.

Yet come 4:30 pm I don't feel at ease. I know myself too well, I need to see him and hear him out, there must be a sound explanation. But, what could it be? I have no idea. I will just hear him out. I am in this feeling so deep. I may just deep dive, besides I lost everything I could think off, as if there's anything else I can still loose.

I went to see him at our usual place, which happen to be a little nook between my office and his, that is a common receiving area for student leaders. When I arrived, he is nowhere to be found, instead a bouquet of fresh pink & purple paper roses is neatly placed by the center table, with a big letter envelope and a rustic looking box. Unsure if its mine, I slightly checked on the card, where a well written scribble of my name there.

I think I like where this is heading.

I opened the box and found familiar items, a set of James Patterson books, a blue mug, a neck pillow, among others, items which are too familiar because ... I sat down, why? Without thinking I dialed Chris' number, and it went straight to voicemail. I left him a message.

'Chris? This is not funny. Where are you, why are you returning these things to me, I can't understand. Call me, please?'

I'm trying not to cry, but this is all surreal. Is he doing what I think he is doing? Returning all the stuff I gave him only means one thing. A break-up. Really?

I opened the envelope, and started reading. It is not a letter, rather a Song Lyric.

I Love You, Goodbye
by Celine Dion

Wish I could be the one

The one who could give you love

The kind of love you really need

Wish I could say to you

That I'll always stay with you

But, baby, that's not me

You need someone willing to give their heart and soul to you

Promise you forever, baby, that's something I can't do

Oh, I could say that I'll be all you need

But that would be a lie

I know I'd only hurt you

I know I'd only make you cry

I'm not the one you're needin'

I love you, goodbye

I hope someday you can

Find some way to understand

I'm only doing this for you

I don't really wanna go

But deep in my heart I know this is the kindest thing to do

You'll find someone who'll be the one that I could never be