Hyunjin sighed as he stared at the luggage that sat beside the front door, pursing his lips in a fine line as tears rolled down his cheeks
He carefully made his way back to the room, tip-toeing in fear of waking the sleeping male
Felix had finally had a happy dream after what felt like eons of having nightmares
Maybe it was the bed He was sleeping in, maybe it was the male who wrapped his arms around him
Maybe it was the way Hyunjin kissed him goodnight
The reasons Felix could finally have sweet dreams were all Hyunjin. His knight in shining armor
His eclipse
His eyes gracefully fluttered open as he was met with the still dark atmosphere, proving that he had woken up still at midnight
He shuddered at the detachment of warmth from his body, missing the arms around his waist, missing the chest that his head layed on
He looked ahead of him to see an empty spot on the bed, the bed that wasn't him, belonging to the male who was missing from his side
It was late at night, around midnight. What would be the logical excuse as to why Hyunjin was missing
He was confused and sad, missing his comforter when he heard shifting on the other side of the room
His eyes trailed to the nightstand ahead of him, carefully reaching his hand out as he found the switch the lamp
The figure whipped it's head back once it heard the flip of the switch followed by golden light
Felix's throat ran dry for a reason he knew not of. "Hyun...what are you doing?" He asked, propping his upper body up by using his elbow as a stand
Hyunjin internally panicked, wiping his tears away before turning to the male
"What are you doing awake? It's late" He purposefully ignored Felix's question with that response
"You weren't in bed. I was missing you" Felix replied with a cute pout on his face, cute enough to drop a load of weight off of Hyunjin's chest
He took several steps forward until he was knelt down infront of the bed, face to face with Felix
His head dropped, getting a little bounce on the mattress as his forehead stayed glued to it
"Why don't you go back to sleep, yeah?" Hyunjin simply replied, not lifting up his head in the least bit
"I can't, you know it's difficult for me to fall back asleep after waking up" Felix replied, laying his hand on the male's head, his fingers massaging the male's scalp
His eyes trailed farther behind Hyunjin, eyes locking on the male's bed that was neatly made
He noticed the hangers of clothing missing from inside their shared closet, shoes completely gone from the shared shelf
It was only then when he realized that there was only one reason for all of that being packed out
"Hyunjin...why are you dressed up?" He timidly asked, the relaxing motions on the male's head stopping
Hyunjin bit his bottom lip, squeezing his eyes shut as he begged the Gods to just put the male to sleep once again
Once the male waited several seconds for an answer, he asked again. "Hyunjin, where are you going?"
After building up all his might, he finally lifted his head and Felix couldn't sworn his heart shattered inside him
The male had puffy red eyes and tears stains on cheeks, fresh tears stinging the marks on his face that he made on himself with his nails
His eyebrows knitted together as he further examined the male's face, his skin flushed red and bottom lip bleeding
It broke Felix to see Hyunjin like that because if he was being honest, it was the first time he'd ever seen the male in that state
"I love you Lix" was all that it took the male to say before he broke down in a pained sob, dropping his head back onto the mattress to try and muffle his sobs
But it didn't help, it made Felix tear up along side many other reasons
Felix's breathing started to quicken, his heart feeling like it was pounding hard enough to break his ribs
"Don't...don't leave me" Felix pleaded, tears threatening to roll down his face
He heard no response to the plea, only increasing his worry and panic
"Hyunjin please...I-I can't- you can't leave me...please" He pleaded once again, tears now freely flowing from his eyes
"I'm so sorry Lix"
And Felix hated himself. He hated how selfish he was being, crying and begging the male to not leave him while Hyunjin was in such a bad state
He may not have known why the male was so brokeen but he knew that he never wanted to see him like this
Felix wanted to comfort him and let him do what he needed to do but he knew that he couldn't live without Hyunjin. Its just his separation anxiety
"Felix, I have to go" Hyunjin spoke, his tone broken and mellow, standing up from his position as he took a second to look down at his love
The only reason he had to smile even in this state. But he knew the reason he had to leave him
He leaned down, his face just a few centimetres away from Felix's face, their noses almost brushing against eachother as his hands met the male's cheeks
He gentle held the male's face, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles on the male's skin as he watched tears roll down the shorter male's face, only making his tears relentlessly roll down his face
"Don't...don't leave" Felix begged, his tone so low if Hyunjin's attention wasn't focused on Felix he might've missed the plea
Like a flower in the winter, it's flavourfully coloured petals fell from it's position, revealing pained thorns, begging to hide itself once again in its blissful mask
A mask that he made sure everyone knew it was the true him when it really wasn't. Truth be told, Felix was the first person to see this side of Hyunjin, other than his now late sister
The side of him that would make you question if the moon that used to light up so bright was just a solid ball of pain
The Hyunjin everyone knew as the fun guy, was really capable of induring this much pain after all?
It would make you question who was at their darkest hour between the two
"I'll be back Felix...I promise" He spoke, mentally cursing himself out when his voice cracked in between
"Four days Lix...I'll be gone for four days, wait for me" He spoke before gently laying his lips on the smaller male's now wet ones from the rapid outpour of tears
After basking in the male's touch, feeling the lips he loved most, holding the face he loved most, he pulled away, his pained eyes gazing right into Felix's orbs
"I'll see you again at dark hour"
><▪︎><
Who do we feel bad for the most?? Hyunjin or Felix??
Do you think Hyunjin's decision is a bad one??
It took me so fucking long to right this chapter and I genuinely don't like it so let me know if I fucked it up in a bad way
Love you all so much <33
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𝗗𝗮𝗿𝗸 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗿 | 𝗛𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗹𝗶𝘅
Fanfiction"I've had darker nights without you" - a boy who's hanging on by a single thread "Then let me be your light" - a boy who is that single thread Felix was known to be in a dark place, his mind and heart playing tricks on him on a daily basis. He could...
