The next day I was called into the principal's office and was suspended for two weeks. Apparently what I said put the poor boy back to rehab."I mean it's not my fault that drugs are the only way he deals with emotions. First I was labeled as the villain for not letting my guard down now I have to be punished for his addiction, wow." I said to principal Walker but she just wouldn't listen. "Crystal you-" "It's Jinx now so if you please." " Sorry. Jinx, you insulted him and refused to apologize and hurt him again." "Well, that's pretty much every day of my life lady. But you don't see me having a mental breakdown and getting people suspended 'cause I'm too weak to handle emotions like a normal person." "Pack your bags, Jinx." Dad was obviously silent.
When we got home Dad congratulated me for not being weak. Which I thought was weird but at least it's something. But then slapped me and said that I'm ruining his reputation. I didn't react. I just walked to the kitchen and grabbed two beers and went to my room. At therapy, they gave me anti-depressions which I didn't take 'cause I'm not depressed. I'm just hiding my emotions which apparently is a big depression sign. But did I care? No, 'cause I have a distraction from the pain. Fighting was one thing that calmed me. Mainly because I would imagine that it was all the people that have ever hurt me. And today I imagine it was Hunter. And it felt good.
I was on my balcony just having a quick smoke before breakfast, when I thought about how I wouldn't feel any of this pain if I didn't exist or if I was dead. Then I had the greatest idea ever. I would kill myself. I mean it's not like anyone would miss me, no one wants me in their lives anyways. So my death shouldn't be such a deal breaker. I sat here with a big smile while listening to These boots are made for walkin', by Nancy Sinatra.
YOU ARE READING
Black Hole
Teen FictionA 17-year-old girl who is constantly in pain and betrayed by her one 'friend' and her father. Jinx has nothing to live for, will she ride or die? Pain is a part of her everyday life. Does she have the strength to push through it?
