I go straight to my cell but when that starts to feel claustrophobic I end up back outside, back on the watchtower. I pace around trying to make sense of all of this. I couldn't be mad that Daryl left with his brother, I might've known him for almost a year now but Merle, that was his big brother who'd been there his whole life.
Part of me is bitter though, Daryl had told me that Merle hadn't been the best brother to him and I guess a part of me hoped he would pick me over him. I shake my head at myself, that was stupid and unfair. If I had the chance to see my sister or any member of my family I would in a heartbeat, I would pick them over the group I know that.
And regardless of the relationship between the brothers, they were all the other had left. I just wish I could've seen him and said goodbye or something. I don't know but all I knew was even if we didn't say a lot to each other just being in Daryl's presence calmed me. Whilst I loved all of the group and had worked up to feeling comfortable with all of them, Daryl was the first one I felt at ease around and he still comforted me the most.
I sigh as my hurt and confusion just turns to plain old sadness. I can't dwell on this, what happened has happened and there's no way for me to change that. I shouldn't let myself get lost in myself when I had people here who'd need me to be me. I could not become a burden to the group again.
I begin on my journey back to the prison when I see Tyreese and his group leaving. "What's going on? He said no?" Honestly I'm shocked, Tyreese and Sasha at least seemed like good people. The other two seemed a bit shady to me but not evil or anything.
"He pulled out his gun and started going all crazy." My brows furrow, "he did?" That was not normal behaviour for Rick, "he was shouting acting all crazy, we had to run."
"I'm so sorry, he's not normally like that, it might just be the stress from what they just went through or I don't know, I really thought he'd let you guys stay." Tyreese gives me a thankful sort of smile, "I'm sorry again, you would've been nice additions to the group." I tell them before handing him my water bottle and the few granola bars I had in the small waist bag I'd found.
"Oh no you don't have to do that." He says but I shake my head and hand it over, "I hope you guys find somewhere safe." They all thank me before they go on their way and I wander back to the prison wondering what was going on with Rick.
When I get back everyone is in their own cells and it's silent. Honestly I was a bit afraid walking around in the dark with such a foreboding feeling in the air. I jump once I get to my own cell and see a shadowy figure on my bunk. "Jesus Glenn, are you trying to give me a heart attack." I feel guilty as soon as I lay eyes on him, I'd been so worried about him all this time and I didn't even greet him when he got back. Too caught up in my own stupid feelings.
"Where were you?" He mumbles as I sit beside him, "outside on watch." I reply before looking at him in the dim light, although it was hard to see, I could see that state he was in and it made my heart hurt. I could imagine what had happened to the two and it broke my heart, I wouldn't wish that upon anyone.
"I was so worried about you." I finally say shuffling forwards, I wanted to hug him but I didn't want to hurt him. It's like he can read my mind because he hugs me, "I'm so sorry you went through this." I mumble as he pulls away and I see his face up close. He shakes his head and tried to assure me that he's fine.
He explains to me what went on in Woodbury, he doesn't tell me anything about Maggie, aside from the fact they were separated. The more he speaks the more horrified I am, at the governor but at Daryl's brother. He'd been the one to capture them to torture Glenn.
"How are you feeling?" I'm baffled by his question because after what they just went through how do my feelings matter at all. I was fine, "it doesn't matter." I say shaking my head, I don't want to think of Daryl else I may start crying. "It does matter, I know how you felt about him." I shake my head again, "nothing was even going on between us anyways, I was just stupid and kissed him twice not like I even knew how he felt about me."
"Come on, we all knew that he felt something for you, everyone could see it." I nod as I feel my eyes begin to sting, "it doesn't matter because he's gone, and I probably won't see him again so I should just get over it already."
