Shred Of Hearts [COMPLETED]

Chapter 40

Ciane.

I stare out the window, emotions flooding my chest. Exus was dead and yet, I still felt hollow. Punishing Exus for what he had done to me had been what drove my life. It had been the only thing that had pushed my life. Before the anger and the thirst for revenge, what had drove me was survival. How to survive a new day, how to hide from Exus. I have spent my life not knowing what I wanted to do because I had never thought beyond Exus. He was always there, hiding in the shadows hunting me, in my memories and nightmares, terrorizing me. Now that he is gone, I'm lost, completely clueless on what to do. What is driving me now?

It has only been a few weeks since his death and the council, the bastards, were called because an alpha has just died. The old men claimed they had paid Exus to investigate the massacre at Christian's pack a five years ago and him being the murderer, he had come up with an enticing tale about the hunters. None of them had bothered to investigate further. Totally their fault.

"What are you thinking about?" His voice startles me and I yelp.

"Dude, you don't do that." I glare at Christian as he grins with amusement and comes to stand right next to me. My eyes shift to meet his tall form and I instantly look away. I was painfully aware now of the attraction I had for him. I didn't want to address it or bring it up. Ever.

"Nothing really. Just how strange things have played out."

His emotions shift and I look at the large expanse of trees covering his mansion.

"Anabelle is set to be executed this week." He mumbles and I turn to look at him, trying to gauge his reaction.

"How does that make you feel?" I inquire.

"Indifferent. At one point I might have considered her my mate but now, I honestly don't care what happens to her." Understandably so.

After the council had visited Exus's pack, it had been disbanded, members being free to choose whatever pack they wanted to join. Christian remained without a pack and the council, because of their own negligence, had suggested he rebuilds The Night Star Pack and invite back members if any were willing to come back. They had promised to offer all the resources necessary to rebuild a pack. He hadn't decided on it yet. And I was curious now.

"Do you plan on rebuilding your pack?" I ask and angle my body towards him. He does the same and we are both staring right at each other now.

"I honestly don't know." He whispers, "Do you remember that particular time I came here and was completely beaten up?" He asks.

How could I forget that? It was the first time I realized there was a story there.

"Yes, vaguely." He grins and my heart pounds.

"Well, I had been looking for a way to free my sister, a way into Exus pack and I had never really discovered much. I stumbled upon three of my pack members. They had completely gone rogue, eyes shifted red. I couldn't believe that the people we had been together had gone completely mad, rogue. It was so scary, I just couldn't find the strength to fight back. The people who I was supposed to lead were stranded out there, completely shattered without an alpha. When the pack was demolished I ran. I couldn't face my people. I had let them down as an alpha, as the heir, as the one whose supposed to be there for them through it all. That even made it worse. Without an alpha, there's no pack. I just don't think I want to put them or myself in that situation ever again." I could hear the palpable grief in his voice and that shakes me too."That is why you never knew I was an alpha. It was something I wanted not to be. I just wanted not to feel the shame associated with what had happened." Christian was embracing his grief, I noted.