The Path To You

34. Proud of you

Connor had calmed enough to pull away from me. It'd been worrying to see him so upset but he'd let himself break knowing I was there to hold him together the best I could. It felt nice to have earned that trust from him. I hadn't pressed to get any answers about what happened, I knew Connor would open up to me when he was ready.

Connor had cracked open that shell he'd hidden in for years. He'd let me see inside and while there was still so much I didn't know I was proud of him for sharing all that he had already.

"I did it Jet, I really fucking did it," his voice was quiet, almost a whisper.

"I'm proud of you Connor,"

It was the truest words I could think of. Connor had overcome so much and now here he was still standing here sober fighting every second he could. I'd known that he could do it and it filled me with pride to see him prove me right.

"I told them everything, I walked in there and told them things I didn't think I'd have the strength to say out loud. I really want a drink but I finally fought back."

I knew that it had been hard for Connor but I was so proud of him for doing it anyway. For walking in there instead of a liquor store, for calling me knowing he'd need someone to help him when he walked out. He'd come such a long way and being able to see that was the best thing I've ever experienced.

"Have I ever told you I think you're one of the strongest people I know?" I asked.

Conner just shook his head, I could see the emotions swimming in his eyes. He was close to crying again and all I wanted was to wrap him up in a hug and try to hold him together the best I could.

"You are, sometimes it amazes me how you just keep going. You pulled yourself back up after everything, you took your life back and now you just keep fighting. You amaze me Connor in all the greatest ways."

"He used to make me feel really weak. It wasn't even just because he proved to me over and over again he could overpower me physically. It was that he made me feel so fucking small and destroyed my own self image. I felt mentally weak, I felt like I had nothing but him. And even when I realized he'd manipulated me it had been too late, I'd let him take over my whole life and I actually had nothing left. He made me forget that I wasn't weak that I was strong enough to keep fighting but you helped me remember that." Connor said his voice tight with emotion.

"He shouldn't get to have that power over you, not anymore. I'm happy to stand here and remind you that you're strong and have more fight than anyone else I know. I'll catch you every time you fall if I have to. You've got me Connor and there's nothing that could change that." I reached out and grabbed his hand giving it a light squeeze.

"I need to get home and tell my parents about everything. I've kept them in the dark this whole time and it's better they hear it from me than someone else." He frowned.

I knew he'd been reluctant to share the truth with his parents. There had been this part of him that had tried to protect them from this but now if he wanted to go through this legal process there was no hiding that. He had to tell them and I just hoped that for his sake it goes well.

"Do you want me to come with you?" I asked.

"I think this is something I need to do by myself but I'm probably going to need you after."

Every time Connor asked for what he needed it made me happy. It showed the growth that he'd done. He was asking for help when he knew he'd need it instead of letting himself drown in a bottle. He was opening up and letting the people around him in. That was a big step for him and it was proof of all the hard work Connor had done in rehab and in therapy.

"I can come home with you and I'll just wait in your room while you talk to your parents. I have some school work I should probably do anyways." I offered.

"You're too good to me Jet Plane." He smiled and just a glimpse of that smile was enough to make my whole day.

"You deserve it."

"You're so pretty when you lie to me." He leaned forward and pressed a light kiss to my forehead.

I wanted to argue but I kept my mouth shut. Connor still had some work to do on his own self worth. He beat himself up a lot over his past actions and his years of drinking. He had a hard time believing that I could look past it all and just focus on his actions now. He'd proved to me over and over again that he was trying to do better and be sober.

He'd seen his high school coach and instead of spiraling he'd held himself up and fought for all that he's worked for. I'd remembered how messed up he was after winter break and a part of me worried that when he showed back up at home and saw his coach I'd have to watch it all happen again. I didn't want to have to keep pulling him up off the ground and watching him try to kill himself.

I'd walked away from that cycle for my own mental health and I didn't think I was ready to be sucked back into it. But Connor had showed me that he could stand on his own. He showed me why I had believed in him in the first place.

He showed me that I made the right decision when I let myself fall for him.

I didn't like to have regrets and there was nothing about Connor that I'd ever regret.

A/n:

Happy pride month everyone!!!! Last year at this time I had a random idea one day in my kitchen and I started writing Crossing Lines. Now that book has 2 million reads and I'm writing the sequel. It's so crazy that it's been a whole year since this journey has begun.

I'm hoping for pride month I can do what I did last year and do a bunch of writing sessions and maybe even get back to twice a week uploads. I'm coming to the end of work soon and I'll have a lot more time to write. But I am going on a birthday trip this month so I'm hoping to get as much done before then as I can.

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter!
-Cora Leigh