lovers & friends × blake griffin [complete] {editing}

44 // normality

Christina's POV||

I woke up this morning, and the first thing I saw was Blake's bare chest. I slowly tilted my head upward to look at Blake, hoping he was still asleep, but he wasn't.

He smiled down at me and placed a lingering kiss to my forehead.

"Good morning, baby."

"Good morning."

He unwrapped his arms, and I sat up and stretched a little. I looked back at Blake, who had this look on his face that I've never seen before. It was like a cross between adoration & pity.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because I love you."

I smiled a little and tried to get up so I could go brush my teeth. Before I could even get out of the bed, Blake was already by my side, picking me up and carrying me to the bathroom so we could do our hygiene thing.

Once we were done, we went back in the room to get dressed.

"Chris?"

"Yeah?"

He cleared his throat, "yesterday...Chasity told me there's something you needed to tell me."

It felt like someone laid a cinderblock on my chest, and every bit of air in my lungs ceased to exist. I knew I had to tell him about this, I just didn't think it'd be this soon.

I turned to face him with tears in my eyes because I know what I'm about to say is gonna hurt him way more than it hurt me.

"Chr-"

"I was pregnant, Blake..."

His face held a look I couldn't really read. I couldn't tell if he was upset about it, and the silence is not making me feel better.

"When you say 'was,' you mean -"

"I lost it."

He nodded, and I noticed his eyes were getting a little glossy. I think I already know what he wants to ask next.

"Was it mine?"

"Y-yeah."

He nodded again, but this time he held his head down, and it broke me. Even though I never wanted kids, I was willing to change my mind for Blake. The fact that I lost our first child pretty much devastated me.

I walked up to him, sat on his lap and lifted his chin so he was looking at me.

"Do you hate me again?" I asked, not realizing what I said.

He furrowed his eyebrows while biting his lip, "I never hated you, Chris, and I could never hate you for something you had no control over."

He laid his head on my shoulder, and I ran my fingers through his hair. We sat in comfortable silence until I decided to ask the question that's been bothering me all morning.

"Blake?"

"Hm?"

"How come you didn't come see me when I first got home?"

He lifted his head as I continued to play with his hair. He played with the hem of my shirt and kept his head down to avoid eye contact.

"I knew a lot of people were gonna come by, and I didn't wanna overwhelm you. And...I thought you didn't wanna see me."

I smiled and giggled a little because he was just as insecure as I was.

"You were the only person I wanted to see when I got home," I said in his ear, making him shudder a little.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, hugging me tightly, and kissed along my jawline. I really have missed being this close to Blake.

"So what should we do until Chasity gets back?" Blake asked, running a hand up and down my side.

I pushed him back on the bed and straddled his waist, taking him completely by surprise. I took my shirt off and threw it somewhere in the room, then leaned down to kiss him. I didn't realize I was grinding my hips against him until he moaned and moved his hands down my back.

"What's gotten into you?" he mumbled against my lips.

Before giving him an answer, I kissed along his jawline up to the outer shell of his ear.

"I haven't had sex in months." I ran my fingers through his hair again, "ya girl has been suffering."

He chuckled deeply in my ear and for some unknown reason, that turned me on more.

"Well then, let me take care of that."

He flipped us over, kissed down my neck and even though I was lying on my back, he effortlessly took my bra off.

Before I knew it, all of our clothes were gone, and he had me moaning his name like a little bitch.

A part of me feels like I shouldn't be rushing back into a relationship with Blake but honestly, I don't care. I love him so much, and I just want everything between us to go back to normal.